Our Story--
We must see more than our own story. Those words were spoken by our pastor Sunday morning. See more than our story. Hearing those words made me pause and think. Actually, they forced me to reflect on my own life. On my way of looking at the world and the people in it.
My story has many chapters. Growing up on a farm in Arkansas, college, marrying the guy on the neighboring farm, moving, moving, moving. Having a son. Continuing my career in several states. Watching our son grow up and move on through college and law school. Being joyful when he found the person to spend his life with. Grandchildren. Lovely, sweet, spirited, normal kids.
Of course there is much more to the story. My life has many sides. So does yours. All those sides make us who we are. Some of it good. Some of it better. A little worse. And some delightful. As long as we are alive, we add new chapters to our story.
Is it possible that we make a judgment on others due to the one story we know about them? Absolutely. It takes a little time and energy to delve into another person's story. We have to listen. Maybe ask a few non threatening questions. Show genuine interest in learning what makes them tick. So much easier to see that one side. So less work. But, we do ourselves such an injustice when we make an assumption and then move on. We never gain insight into the real person. We only see that one side that everyone else sees.
Certainly our story includes our families and career. But, more than that, I think this is about investing energy in knowing others. Realizing that everyone has multiple layers. Some folks hold their true story close to their heart. There is no need or want to share. At least to every person who comes into view. Trust must first be established before we divulge our true story. Often we do that deep sharing with one or two. We are careful and cautious about our lives. That is a very good thing. Not everyone is trustworthy. As we spend time with another person, we learn who they are especially if they share a bit more deeply from their own story.
As we come to know another planet walker, we see the depth of their lives. We are allowed to see their joys and sorrows. We are privileged to hear about their failures and disappointments. And we feel a little less fearful about sharing our own warts. We have a knowledge down deep within our soul that this person is a gift given to us. A gift that we must treasure.
When we are out doing what we do and meeting people, realize that they have multiple stories. They are layers of experiences and beliefs. Give a little slack to those who annoy. Perhaps they have reason to be cranky. We are all a little cranky at times. Understand that we are seeing one side of their life. One piece of their puzzle. And they are seeing the same in us.
We get to write our own story. Everyday. Every minute. When my story seems frivilous, I have the power to move toward more meaning. So do you. When our time is over on this planet, our story will remain. In fact, it is all that will remain. What do we want our story to be?
I think I have a little work to do! Want to make the sides of my story full of meaning and fun. How about you?
Tuesday, July 21, 2015
Tuesday, July 7, 2015
Toxic. Really?
Toxic. Really?
Toxic. The pet word of today. The word used to describe so many things. Water, air, relationships. So much more.
The elements that give us life and keep us living must be free from toxic chemicals. Free from any contamination that has the power to destroy people, animals, plants. Our eco system depends on a healthy environment to sustain life. It took years and years for people to realize or admit that we must tend to our earth just as we tend to everything else in our world. In certain instances, we waited too late. Those tree hugging hippies did us all a favor by refusing to give in to powerful companies. Only takes a few people with a deep sense of right and wrong to make a difference and change the world.
Toxic seems to be the word some people love to use on social media. When I read that word, I wonder what has happened to those who have written it. Usually it is written in reference to people. My guess is it is written about people who don't agree with the writer. Or who might have a difference of opinion. I certainly agree that we need to walk away from those whose purpose is to pull us down. However, it has been my experience that there are only a few who fit that category.
Whatever happened to friendly discussion? Are we so right that we are afraid that someone with a different opinion might contaminate us? Can we not see another point of view? Is the way we believe the way it truly is? Do we hide within our little group of like-minded people and refuse to see anything that doesn't fit into that box we have built? Is it essential that everyone have the same values and beliefs and actions that we have? Or can we see value in discussion? Can we allow ourselves to think outside the tiny box that we hold close? What might happen if we opened the door to that box and walked among the rest of the world? It is so easy to stay within our own system of belief. So easy to say the right words. So easy to do the acts of kindness. So easy to care for others. Yet, I wonder down deep within our souls who we really are. Do we see ourselves in truth, or do we see what we want to see?
I have learned that there are only a few who want to take part in serious discussion about their beliefs. What are we afraid of? Are we afraid that if others learn what we think, they will think we are strange? How safe we live. We look alike, sound alike, talk alike. Anyone who isn't like us--well, we can be friendly and kind.
Toxic is a serious word. If people understood it was being used about them, it would be too hurtful to digest. Who has the right to label another with that word? Just because there are differences of opinion does not mean that a person is--that word. It means there is disagreement. It means there are different values. It might mean one person sits in judgement of others. I don't like that word being used against people. I think it would be better to simply sit down and visit with anyone whose relationship is going south. End it with kindness. At least from your side of the situation. Labeling those who are different from us is very serious business.
If saying that I wonder if we are an experiment placed here to work out challenges and see what good we can do is toxic, then so be it. I don't know why we are here. When I think about this earth, this tiny earth, spinning around in space, my mind cannot take it in. The more we know about all of this, the more wonderful it is. And I wonder why we were placed here. How we were placed here. What we are to learn? What we are to do? We are so small. Yet within our small being is the power to do so much good. Why do we waste our time worrying about one person who might not be our best friend? Who might bring something we find offensive to our world? Is it really that important? If we were placed here to see what we could do and become, are we succeeding? Thinking about life from a different point of view does not mean I am a toxic person. It simply means, to me, that I think about many things and don't accept a simple answer. Sometimes. Often.
Yes, there are people who have evil as their purpose. Their life. They fail to recognize the wonder of it all. They are part of a system that I don't understand. When I see the world, I see precious people. People who simply want to have the opportunity to live and be at peace. We can be different yet get along. We don't have to hurt one another. Yet we do. Now, those are the toxic people. Those whose main objective is to kill and hurt as many as possible. Those who believe their way is the only way. Those are mean spirited people. Those are get even people.
So, perhaps we might rethink that ugly word. That word that is used to describe oil spills and factories spewing poison into the air. It is used to discuss the bug and plant killing chemicals we spray on plants. It is a killer of life. Human, animal, plant. It is serious business. We legislate against many things that are toxic. We impose fines. We try to control that which hurts this space.
Just because we are different from others does not mean we are toxic. If my church is not the same as yours, that doesn't mean either is toxic. It simply means that we have chosen to accept the beliefs of the one we attend. Even then it is possible to disagree within that structure. To my mind it becomes toxic when there is no tolerance or love for others. Especially those who are outside our own group. Often we believe we are different from our chosen group. Maybe a little more enlightened. A little more tolerant. I wonder.
Ok. I am finished with toxic. It is a word I hardly ever use. I never use it in relationship to other folks. I value the fact that others live on this space with me. We may not agree. We may not even like one another, but I am not the judge of them. It is not my place to hide behind words written in social media and put others in their place. It simply is not my right. It is my right and duty to do good and help others while I have breath. To encourage others. Not just those who are like me. But those who are very different from me. After all, I am only a tiny speck on a very small ball revolving in a huge space.
Done.
Toxic. The pet word of today. The word used to describe so many things. Water, air, relationships. So much more.
The elements that give us life and keep us living must be free from toxic chemicals. Free from any contamination that has the power to destroy people, animals, plants. Our eco system depends on a healthy environment to sustain life. It took years and years for people to realize or admit that we must tend to our earth just as we tend to everything else in our world. In certain instances, we waited too late. Those tree hugging hippies did us all a favor by refusing to give in to powerful companies. Only takes a few people with a deep sense of right and wrong to make a difference and change the world.
Toxic seems to be the word some people love to use on social media. When I read that word, I wonder what has happened to those who have written it. Usually it is written in reference to people. My guess is it is written about people who don't agree with the writer. Or who might have a difference of opinion. I certainly agree that we need to walk away from those whose purpose is to pull us down. However, it has been my experience that there are only a few who fit that category.
Whatever happened to friendly discussion? Are we so right that we are afraid that someone with a different opinion might contaminate us? Can we not see another point of view? Is the way we believe the way it truly is? Do we hide within our little group of like-minded people and refuse to see anything that doesn't fit into that box we have built? Is it essential that everyone have the same values and beliefs and actions that we have? Or can we see value in discussion? Can we allow ourselves to think outside the tiny box that we hold close? What might happen if we opened the door to that box and walked among the rest of the world? It is so easy to stay within our own system of belief. So easy to say the right words. So easy to do the acts of kindness. So easy to care for others. Yet, I wonder down deep within our souls who we really are. Do we see ourselves in truth, or do we see what we want to see?
I have learned that there are only a few who want to take part in serious discussion about their beliefs. What are we afraid of? Are we afraid that if others learn what we think, they will think we are strange? How safe we live. We look alike, sound alike, talk alike. Anyone who isn't like us--well, we can be friendly and kind.
Toxic is a serious word. If people understood it was being used about them, it would be too hurtful to digest. Who has the right to label another with that word? Just because there are differences of opinion does not mean that a person is--that word. It means there is disagreement. It means there are different values. It might mean one person sits in judgement of others. I don't like that word being used against people. I think it would be better to simply sit down and visit with anyone whose relationship is going south. End it with kindness. At least from your side of the situation. Labeling those who are different from us is very serious business.
If saying that I wonder if we are an experiment placed here to work out challenges and see what good we can do is toxic, then so be it. I don't know why we are here. When I think about this earth, this tiny earth, spinning around in space, my mind cannot take it in. The more we know about all of this, the more wonderful it is. And I wonder why we were placed here. How we were placed here. What we are to learn? What we are to do? We are so small. Yet within our small being is the power to do so much good. Why do we waste our time worrying about one person who might not be our best friend? Who might bring something we find offensive to our world? Is it really that important? If we were placed here to see what we could do and become, are we succeeding? Thinking about life from a different point of view does not mean I am a toxic person. It simply means, to me, that I think about many things and don't accept a simple answer. Sometimes. Often.
Yes, there are people who have evil as their purpose. Their life. They fail to recognize the wonder of it all. They are part of a system that I don't understand. When I see the world, I see precious people. People who simply want to have the opportunity to live and be at peace. We can be different yet get along. We don't have to hurt one another. Yet we do. Now, those are the toxic people. Those whose main objective is to kill and hurt as many as possible. Those who believe their way is the only way. Those are mean spirited people. Those are get even people.
So, perhaps we might rethink that ugly word. That word that is used to describe oil spills and factories spewing poison into the air. It is used to discuss the bug and plant killing chemicals we spray on plants. It is a killer of life. Human, animal, plant. It is serious business. We legislate against many things that are toxic. We impose fines. We try to control that which hurts this space.
Just because we are different from others does not mean we are toxic. If my church is not the same as yours, that doesn't mean either is toxic. It simply means that we have chosen to accept the beliefs of the one we attend. Even then it is possible to disagree within that structure. To my mind it becomes toxic when there is no tolerance or love for others. Especially those who are outside our own group. Often we believe we are different from our chosen group. Maybe a little more enlightened. A little more tolerant. I wonder.
Ok. I am finished with toxic. It is a word I hardly ever use. I never use it in relationship to other folks. I value the fact that others live on this space with me. We may not agree. We may not even like one another, but I am not the judge of them. It is not my place to hide behind words written in social media and put others in their place. It simply is not my right. It is my right and duty to do good and help others while I have breath. To encourage others. Not just those who are like me. But those who are very different from me. After all, I am only a tiny speck on a very small ball revolving in a huge space.
Done.
Monday, July 6, 2015
What Drives You?
What Drives You?
What drives each of us? What one thing or combination of things drive us? A question worth examining. Deserves a second look.
Fear. Fear has the power to drive us. Fear puts our defenses up. When we feel threatened, we feel fear. Fear that someone or something will override us. Feeling threatened causes us to behave in ways we would not ordinarily behave. We might pull in to protect ourselves. We might become agitated. Fear plays out in numerous ways in our lives. If you have experienced fear, then you know what words apply for you. You understand what happened at that exact moment you felt fear. A rapid heart beat, apprehension. Fear can certainly be a very good thing. We don't want to walk into situations that present immediate danger. Like walking into a lion's cage. Extreme, right? I think you know what I am saying. We have all turned and walked away when fear showed itself. Living with a fear that drives us--something to think about. It is a hiding place.
Anger. Our best friend. The one that stands up for us. That causes our blood to stir. That allows us to bully our way through situations and people. Anger takes on many faces. It may appear in hurtful, hateful words. It can cause us to strike out at others. We might hit something or someone. Our blood pressure certainly rises. In times of extreme anger it is possible that we don't hear anyone but ourselves. We are so sure we are in the right, and someone else or some situation is wrong. Thinking flies out the window. We behave on raw emotion. Doors slam. Faces become distorted. Voices rise. Accusations are flung out into the air. Not one thought is given to the other person or situation. This is lash out time. And boy, is it fun. I would much rather yell about how I have been wronged than give a thought to my part in the entire situation. Anger becomes a defense mechanism. We are justified in feeling anger.
Anger has a positive side as well. It moves us to action when action is necessary. Anger sees a system that allows children to be hungry while corporations become richer. Anger has the power to move us to seek ways to combat injustice to children. They are helpless in a world full of people who have more than is needed to live a full life. Moving people off their ground zero into seeing truth can cause anger. But, it is righteous anger. It is anger for a right purpose. It isn't aimed at a person who didn't do something we wanted at the exact moment we wanted it. It is anger that makes this world a better place for others with great need. Being civil is the way to move others most of the time. But there are times when anger has its place.
Hate. Such a hard, ugly word. At least for me. Hate has the power to consume. To take total control over our thoughts, emotions and behaviors. It allows for no discussion. It sees everything through one set of eyes. Hate overrides our entire being. From where I sit, this is a part of us that needs to be examined and controlled. When I happen to be in the presence of hate, I try to exit immediately. However, it is a word we throw around. We hate peas. We hate hot weather. We hate rain. We hate a neighbor. We hate our President. We hate, hate, hate. It could be that we use this word to mean dislike. I certainly hope so. It is possible that people who use hate in their sentences have no idea that they are being judged by those words. They are usually negative. If there is a down side to anything, they are all over it. It is easy to become a hateful person. Life is certainly not fair. Situations arise in all lives when fair treatment is extended to others but not us. We feel the sting of rejection. We are overlooked for that promotion. Someone we don't like was awarded the better paying job. Teachers pick on our person. And it goes on and on. Yes, hate is easy. Forgiving and moving on makes for a healthier, more enjoyable life. The choice is ours--a difficult one.
Disgust. Write your own thoughts.
Love. Much more than a word. An action. A verb. Our culture throws this word around so much that it is difficult to grasp the real meaning. Love has many uses. We love so much in this world. A gentle breeze on a hot day. Ice cream. That new outfit that makes us look amazing. A trip to a new place. I love that we love so many things. Loving things is not bad. It only becomes a negative when things are more important than those who live in our space. Love means saying you are sorry for an action or words that hurt another. Love means walking that extra mile or two to be of assistance to someone in need whether you know them or not. Love wraps its arms around hurting folks bringing comfort and care. Love smiles and laughs. It refuses to wear a chip that begs to be knocked off that shoulder. It puts itself out there knowing hurt may come. Misunderstanding may arise. It knows that communication is the key to righting wrongs. And lack of communication ends relationships. Love gives others that last word we all so desperately want. What real difference does it make who says those last ugly words, anyway?
Love does not allow itself to be walked over. I think it is called tough love. That phrase means that even when we love someone, we will do what is necessary to move them to a better place in their lives. We might refuse to do what they ask or demand. We might take an action that seems terrible to those who do not understand. We might bring an intervention hoping to move someone forward in their lives. We might end a hurtful relationship. Loving does not mean everything will be rosy. It means we will rejoice in those moments that are beautiful and refuse to be drawn into someone else's beliefs if those are not our own. Yes, we will probably be accused of not loving when we take a stand that is difficult for others. We know the truth. We are loving from the deepest part of our being.
There are so many more emotions that I could list. You would become fatigued from reading. The point is something drives each of us. We live with that one thing or combination of things that move us to be who we are. Realizing the force that moves us helps us rethink. Do we really want to be driven by something that is not the best? Takes work. Lots of work. Might even take changing our minds. Oh no! Not that. We have held onto those emotions our entire life. What might happen if we try to move toward being a healthier person? Will others reject our effort? Do we care?
Each day we are driven by something we hardly recognize anymore. We don't name it. It is simply who we are, we say. Or is it?
What drives each of us? What one thing or combination of things drive us? A question worth examining. Deserves a second look.
Fear. Fear has the power to drive us. Fear puts our defenses up. When we feel threatened, we feel fear. Fear that someone or something will override us. Feeling threatened causes us to behave in ways we would not ordinarily behave. We might pull in to protect ourselves. We might become agitated. Fear plays out in numerous ways in our lives. If you have experienced fear, then you know what words apply for you. You understand what happened at that exact moment you felt fear. A rapid heart beat, apprehension. Fear can certainly be a very good thing. We don't want to walk into situations that present immediate danger. Like walking into a lion's cage. Extreme, right? I think you know what I am saying. We have all turned and walked away when fear showed itself. Living with a fear that drives us--something to think about. It is a hiding place.
Anger. Our best friend. The one that stands up for us. That causes our blood to stir. That allows us to bully our way through situations and people. Anger takes on many faces. It may appear in hurtful, hateful words. It can cause us to strike out at others. We might hit something or someone. Our blood pressure certainly rises. In times of extreme anger it is possible that we don't hear anyone but ourselves. We are so sure we are in the right, and someone else or some situation is wrong. Thinking flies out the window. We behave on raw emotion. Doors slam. Faces become distorted. Voices rise. Accusations are flung out into the air. Not one thought is given to the other person or situation. This is lash out time. And boy, is it fun. I would much rather yell about how I have been wronged than give a thought to my part in the entire situation. Anger becomes a defense mechanism. We are justified in feeling anger.
Anger has a positive side as well. It moves us to action when action is necessary. Anger sees a system that allows children to be hungry while corporations become richer. Anger has the power to move us to seek ways to combat injustice to children. They are helpless in a world full of people who have more than is needed to live a full life. Moving people off their ground zero into seeing truth can cause anger. But, it is righteous anger. It is anger for a right purpose. It isn't aimed at a person who didn't do something we wanted at the exact moment we wanted it. It is anger that makes this world a better place for others with great need. Being civil is the way to move others most of the time. But there are times when anger has its place.
Hate. Such a hard, ugly word. At least for me. Hate has the power to consume. To take total control over our thoughts, emotions and behaviors. It allows for no discussion. It sees everything through one set of eyes. Hate overrides our entire being. From where I sit, this is a part of us that needs to be examined and controlled. When I happen to be in the presence of hate, I try to exit immediately. However, it is a word we throw around. We hate peas. We hate hot weather. We hate rain. We hate a neighbor. We hate our President. We hate, hate, hate. It could be that we use this word to mean dislike. I certainly hope so. It is possible that people who use hate in their sentences have no idea that they are being judged by those words. They are usually negative. If there is a down side to anything, they are all over it. It is easy to become a hateful person. Life is certainly not fair. Situations arise in all lives when fair treatment is extended to others but not us. We feel the sting of rejection. We are overlooked for that promotion. Someone we don't like was awarded the better paying job. Teachers pick on our person. And it goes on and on. Yes, hate is easy. Forgiving and moving on makes for a healthier, more enjoyable life. The choice is ours--a difficult one.
Disgust. Write your own thoughts.
Love. Much more than a word. An action. A verb. Our culture throws this word around so much that it is difficult to grasp the real meaning. Love has many uses. We love so much in this world. A gentle breeze on a hot day. Ice cream. That new outfit that makes us look amazing. A trip to a new place. I love that we love so many things. Loving things is not bad. It only becomes a negative when things are more important than those who live in our space. Love means saying you are sorry for an action or words that hurt another. Love means walking that extra mile or two to be of assistance to someone in need whether you know them or not. Love wraps its arms around hurting folks bringing comfort and care. Love smiles and laughs. It refuses to wear a chip that begs to be knocked off that shoulder. It puts itself out there knowing hurt may come. Misunderstanding may arise. It knows that communication is the key to righting wrongs. And lack of communication ends relationships. Love gives others that last word we all so desperately want. What real difference does it make who says those last ugly words, anyway?
Love does not allow itself to be walked over. I think it is called tough love. That phrase means that even when we love someone, we will do what is necessary to move them to a better place in their lives. We might refuse to do what they ask or demand. We might take an action that seems terrible to those who do not understand. We might bring an intervention hoping to move someone forward in their lives. We might end a hurtful relationship. Loving does not mean everything will be rosy. It means we will rejoice in those moments that are beautiful and refuse to be drawn into someone else's beliefs if those are not our own. Yes, we will probably be accused of not loving when we take a stand that is difficult for others. We know the truth. We are loving from the deepest part of our being.
There are so many more emotions that I could list. You would become fatigued from reading. The point is something drives each of us. We live with that one thing or combination of things that move us to be who we are. Realizing the force that moves us helps us rethink. Do we really want to be driven by something that is not the best? Takes work. Lots of work. Might even take changing our minds. Oh no! Not that. We have held onto those emotions our entire life. What might happen if we try to move toward being a healthier person? Will others reject our effort? Do we care?
Each day we are driven by something we hardly recognize anymore. We don't name it. It is simply who we are, we say. Or is it?
Sunday, June 28, 2015
A Thoughtful Moment
A Thoughtful Moment--
Sitting at a table in the middle of a corridor in the airport. Enjoying a lovely cup of coffee. Thinking about being back in our home, and all the plans we have.
My thoughts turned from the projects awaiting to the people all around me. Some were walking slowly. No doubt they had a layover so there was no need to rush. Others were hurrying. Running even. Planes wait for no one. They knew that. Food courts full of customers with wallets in hand ready to purchase food for the journey. Interesting shops abuzz with lookers. A few walked out with treasures wrapped in tissue paper.
All sizes and shapes. The people, I mean. Such diversity. Pink hair, blue hair. Brown and blonde hair. Red hair from nature and bottles. Boots, sandals, tennis shoes. Very high heels worn by very young women. Young women who had given considerable thought to how they would look that day. Black lace-up boots.
Diversity in clothing styles, also. Shorts, slack, long skirts, jeans. All colors and designs worn together creating a look that shouted LOOK AT ME. And I did. Loved it that people felt free to be themselves. To wear clothing that, on a canvas, would be an abstract painting. Swirls, stripes, checks all in bright colors. These belonged mostly to the young. Those who had not felt the pull to fall in line with the black slacks and jacket. There is nothing wrong with dressing in a conservative manner. The majority of people do. However, it is so refreshing to see those who will take the risk of being different. Maybe it isn't a risk to them. I love it.
Everyone I observed was either heading away or returning. Many languages were spoken. All together in this one spot. One moment in time. Walking side-by-side. Smiling. Offering a helping hand. Moving to allow those in a hurry to pass. At peace with one another. Never to be together in this one spot again. Yes, a moment in time.
As I looked over this sea of humanity, I was struck once again with the knowledge that we are all one small speck of dust. No matter how important we believe we are, we are all the same. Made from dust. We cannot escape that fact. We are put together the exact same way. Yet, these specks of dust have the power to change the world. Isn't that an amazing truth? People have the power to change this world into something so much more magnificent. It seems we tend to forget that we are much more alike than different. How wonderful if we could celebrate our likeness. For peace to reign on this planet, we have to get to that place.
On this ball revolving through space, we all move about. Probably never thinking about how marvelous it all is. This beautiful place we call home. This planet that provides us with exactly what we need to live and thrive. Just outside our ceiling is a world that would take our lives in an instant. Just outside. Yet, we are safe here. We are protected here. We should take a few minutes to be grateful and thankful that we are in such a lovely place in this vast universe.
And then my mind reminds me that each person sharing space with me in this airport is a precious person. Precious to those who await their return. Ready to welcome them home. Each belonging to a familly. Each with a purpose for life. Each acting on what they believe is their purpose. Peaceful and loving. Families pushing babies. Babies held tightly against a mother's chest sleeping soundly. The promise of a future within that sleeping babe. Strollers full of little people, bags, purses, food, computers, toys and so much more move among the crowds. Yes, it is a time to be thankful for the precious gift of life.
Inside the minds and hearts of all these people are solutions for hunger, poverty, inequality, war. Someone walking the corridors of this airport has an idea for one or more of these challenges. That person only needs to meet another person with the same shared passion. Great ideas waiting to give birth are all around. Which one? Who has the desire to be the change that must happen? Him? Her? Them?
Glancing at my watch I see that it is almost time to board the plane. One last glance before I put the empty cup in the recycle bin. Happily we make our way to our silver bullet that will slice through time and space and eventually deliver us safely to our destination. Feeling the wonder of it all.
Much can be learned at an airport.
Sitting at a table in the middle of a corridor in the airport. Enjoying a lovely cup of coffee. Thinking about being back in our home, and all the plans we have.
My thoughts turned from the projects awaiting to the people all around me. Some were walking slowly. No doubt they had a layover so there was no need to rush. Others were hurrying. Running even. Planes wait for no one. They knew that. Food courts full of customers with wallets in hand ready to purchase food for the journey. Interesting shops abuzz with lookers. A few walked out with treasures wrapped in tissue paper.
All sizes and shapes. The people, I mean. Such diversity. Pink hair, blue hair. Brown and blonde hair. Red hair from nature and bottles. Boots, sandals, tennis shoes. Very high heels worn by very young women. Young women who had given considerable thought to how they would look that day. Black lace-up boots.
Diversity in clothing styles, also. Shorts, slack, long skirts, jeans. All colors and designs worn together creating a look that shouted LOOK AT ME. And I did. Loved it that people felt free to be themselves. To wear clothing that, on a canvas, would be an abstract painting. Swirls, stripes, checks all in bright colors. These belonged mostly to the young. Those who had not felt the pull to fall in line with the black slacks and jacket. There is nothing wrong with dressing in a conservative manner. The majority of people do. However, it is so refreshing to see those who will take the risk of being different. Maybe it isn't a risk to them. I love it.
Everyone I observed was either heading away or returning. Many languages were spoken. All together in this one spot. One moment in time. Walking side-by-side. Smiling. Offering a helping hand. Moving to allow those in a hurry to pass. At peace with one another. Never to be together in this one spot again. Yes, a moment in time.
As I looked over this sea of humanity, I was struck once again with the knowledge that we are all one small speck of dust. No matter how important we believe we are, we are all the same. Made from dust. We cannot escape that fact. We are put together the exact same way. Yet, these specks of dust have the power to change the world. Isn't that an amazing truth? People have the power to change this world into something so much more magnificent. It seems we tend to forget that we are much more alike than different. How wonderful if we could celebrate our likeness. For peace to reign on this planet, we have to get to that place.
On this ball revolving through space, we all move about. Probably never thinking about how marvelous it all is. This beautiful place we call home. This planet that provides us with exactly what we need to live and thrive. Just outside our ceiling is a world that would take our lives in an instant. Just outside. Yet, we are safe here. We are protected here. We should take a few minutes to be grateful and thankful that we are in such a lovely place in this vast universe.
And then my mind reminds me that each person sharing space with me in this airport is a precious person. Precious to those who await their return. Ready to welcome them home. Each belonging to a familly. Each with a purpose for life. Each acting on what they believe is their purpose. Peaceful and loving. Families pushing babies. Babies held tightly against a mother's chest sleeping soundly. The promise of a future within that sleeping babe. Strollers full of little people, bags, purses, food, computers, toys and so much more move among the crowds. Yes, it is a time to be thankful for the precious gift of life.
Inside the minds and hearts of all these people are solutions for hunger, poverty, inequality, war. Someone walking the corridors of this airport has an idea for one or more of these challenges. That person only needs to meet another person with the same shared passion. Great ideas waiting to give birth are all around. Which one? Who has the desire to be the change that must happen? Him? Her? Them?
Glancing at my watch I see that it is almost time to board the plane. One last glance before I put the empty cup in the recycle bin. Happily we make our way to our silver bullet that will slice through time and space and eventually deliver us safely to our destination. Feeling the wonder of it all.
Much can be learned at an airport.
Tuesday, June 23, 2015
A Brief Encounter
A Brief Encounter--
We met them as we turned the corner. They were pulling suitcases. He looked tired and sweaty. She tried to put on that happy face that strangers do sometimes. It was evident they had had a very long day.
We pulled up along side of them and asked how their day had been. Where had they started from? They were eager to share the story of their day. It began in California. Things went south from those words. A three hour delay. Three hours is a long time to be delayed at an airport or on a plane. I didn't ask which. He said they were given bottles of warm water and warm soda. His face was not a happy face when he said those words.
We stopped for a bit and visited. I asked why they were in Salem. She said they were moving here. They came to purchase a house. Already had some spots in mind. It was obvious they were excited about the prospect of starting life in a new place.
We spoke for a few minutes, and then said our goodbyes. We wished them well as they began their new life. They looked like they needed a shower and food. And cold water.
It was a quick encounter. Strangers passing in a hotel hallway. Nothing deep or lasting. Yet, I think there is a lesson or two in these types of meetings. We learn much when we take the time to engage with strangers. We learn their dreams. Their hopes. Their desires. We learn what makes them happy, and what is a discouragement to them. And because they were so willing to share, we were able to give them encouragement.
A brief moment in time. So much of life is just that. Brief moments. Those quick moments leave lasting impressions, don't they? When I think of that couple last evening, I think of all that awaits them on this new journey. I remember how eager they were to begin. They reminded me that life is full of moments that seem unimportant, but really do have much to teach us.
Not all encounters are so sweet. There are times when ugly words are spoken. Words that stay with us for a lifetime. Words that serve no real purpose. Words that are meant to hurt. Sometimes those words catch us by surprise. Sometimes we are not surprised at all because we know where they came from. Then there are those times when we speak words that are not uplifting. Not encouraging. Not kind. Once in awhile words like these are written down for the receiver to read. To respond or not?
Let's put words on a scale. Tipping the scale on the right are all the words that make people want to move forward. Words of encouragement to try that new thing. Words that bring a smile. Words that comfort. Words that build up those who are discouraged. Words that tickle our hearts. Words that correct with kindness. Words of care. Words full of joy. And hope. And love.
On the left side of the scale let's put......no, let's not put any words that bring unhappiness to anyone. Let's fill both sides of the scale with positive, uplifting words. Let's be the person others wish to be around. Let's do that. Shall we?
Even though they were beyond tired, they wanted to tell their story. We all need that. We need someone to listen to our experiences. We need strangers to laugh about our horrid day waiting to leave an airport. We need one another. It is that simple. What we don't need is judgment. We really do not need that.
They never intended to remind me about the importance of moments. They would probably be quite surprised to learn that they did. I am grateful for those two sweet souls who took a short walk with us and shared their life. May we never forget that moments are what life is made of. One after another. After another. After another...
We met them as we turned the corner. They were pulling suitcases. He looked tired and sweaty. She tried to put on that happy face that strangers do sometimes. It was evident they had had a very long day.
We pulled up along side of them and asked how their day had been. Where had they started from? They were eager to share the story of their day. It began in California. Things went south from those words. A three hour delay. Three hours is a long time to be delayed at an airport or on a plane. I didn't ask which. He said they were given bottles of warm water and warm soda. His face was not a happy face when he said those words.
We stopped for a bit and visited. I asked why they were in Salem. She said they were moving here. They came to purchase a house. Already had some spots in mind. It was obvious they were excited about the prospect of starting life in a new place.
We spoke for a few minutes, and then said our goodbyes. We wished them well as they began their new life. They looked like they needed a shower and food. And cold water.
It was a quick encounter. Strangers passing in a hotel hallway. Nothing deep or lasting. Yet, I think there is a lesson or two in these types of meetings. We learn much when we take the time to engage with strangers. We learn their dreams. Their hopes. Their desires. We learn what makes them happy, and what is a discouragement to them. And because they were so willing to share, we were able to give them encouragement.
A brief moment in time. So much of life is just that. Brief moments. Those quick moments leave lasting impressions, don't they? When I think of that couple last evening, I think of all that awaits them on this new journey. I remember how eager they were to begin. They reminded me that life is full of moments that seem unimportant, but really do have much to teach us.
Not all encounters are so sweet. There are times when ugly words are spoken. Words that stay with us for a lifetime. Words that serve no real purpose. Words that are meant to hurt. Sometimes those words catch us by surprise. Sometimes we are not surprised at all because we know where they came from. Then there are those times when we speak words that are not uplifting. Not encouraging. Not kind. Once in awhile words like these are written down for the receiver to read. To respond or not?
Let's put words on a scale. Tipping the scale on the right are all the words that make people want to move forward. Words of encouragement to try that new thing. Words that bring a smile. Words that comfort. Words that build up those who are discouraged. Words that tickle our hearts. Words that correct with kindness. Words of care. Words full of joy. And hope. And love.
On the left side of the scale let's put......no, let's not put any words that bring unhappiness to anyone. Let's fill both sides of the scale with positive, uplifting words. Let's be the person others wish to be around. Let's do that. Shall we?
Even though they were beyond tired, they wanted to tell their story. We all need that. We need someone to listen to our experiences. We need strangers to laugh about our horrid day waiting to leave an airport. We need one another. It is that simple. What we don't need is judgment. We really do not need that.
They never intended to remind me about the importance of moments. They would probably be quite surprised to learn that they did. I am grateful for those two sweet souls who took a short walk with us and shared their life. May we never forget that moments are what life is made of. One after another. After another. After another...
Sunday, June 21, 2015
The Magic of Sand
The Magic of Sand-
Recently we had the opportunity to watch creative people build sand castles. We watched them build forms, fill those forms with sand and over a bit of time make magic out of sand. Sand that only a few minutes before it was shoveled into buckets and poured into forms was rather nondescript. Just sand.
Sand became the material for dreamers. It allowed itself to change. To become what the dreamer pictured in the mind. Occasionally it would escape the forms only to be shoved and pushed back into the spot it had vacated. Large mounds became mice and frogs. Castles emerged. Bridges and churches evolved. Whatever the dreamer imagined became real.
The atmosphere was festive. Spectators wandered up and down the line of creators and creations. Everyone talked about their favorite. Cameras and phones snapped pictures to show to those who were not in attendance. Questions were asked of the workers. What tools were they allowed to use? How long before the tide washed the wonders away? Did they mourn the devestation as they watched their creations destroyed?
It allowed itself to change. My goodness. What a lesson for us all. If something as simple as sand has the ability to become a majestic castle, then what are the possibilities for the human race? One grain of sand added to another grain of sand and another has the ability to become something wonderful. We humans have the same ability. We live on this planet together, and together we have the ability to become something majestic. When we work toward a worthy goal that blesses the lives of others, we create something wonderful. For that to happen, cooperation is necessary.
Ten people were allowed inside the designated area for creating a sand castle. Only ten. Those ten people knew their jobs. They knew what had to be accomplished. They understood their role in the creative process. Each concentrated on their part. With knives and turkey basters, they manipulated the sand. It became paint in their hands. Ten people working toward the same goal. No arguing about whose part was the most important. No bickering about needing help. No fussing about being too tired to continue. Only happy faces. Faces concentrating. Examining their work. Changing when change was necessary.
And I thought that is how good gets accomplished. One person shares a dream with another. Then another learns and joins. Soon the original dream is better because more people are involved. Ideas are shared. Questions are asked. Everyone works toward the shared goal. People with different backgrounds, different ideas, different experiences joining together because they know that together more can be accomplished. Being part of a group that brightens the planet is joyful.
If one grain of sand has the power to become something much bigger by joining other grains of sand, what does that say to us? To those of us who have the ability to work together? Who see situations everyday that need change? Who have more than we need yet continue to strive for more? Who fill our lives with good but possibly not the best? What holds us back? Do we need a form just like the sand to hold us together as we strive to make our space on this planet better? Something beautiful? Do we believe that our time has come and gone? We all have to answer these and other questions for ourselves. Is sand ever too old to become something changed? Something different?
It is true. Grains of sand do not change unless they are forced. People are sometimes like that, too. It is a simple thing to become complacent. To be so satisfied with ourselves and our lives that we fail to see the obvious. That we are but one grain of sand amid thousands. As I walked among the large crowds of people watching the magic happen, I was so aware of how alike we all are. People were talking together. Holding the hands of children. Laughing at shared stories. Visiting with strangers. And I thought how wonderful it was to see all the different nationalities together enjoying the day.
I walked away from the festivities with a full heart. I felt hopeful for our world. Hopeful that all of us living together on this planet have the ability to be changed. To be transformed into something wonderful. It all depends on the forms we allow to shape us. And our ability to allow ourselves to become something new.
Recently we had the opportunity to watch creative people build sand castles. We watched them build forms, fill those forms with sand and over a bit of time make magic out of sand. Sand that only a few minutes before it was shoveled into buckets and poured into forms was rather nondescript. Just sand.
Sand became the material for dreamers. It allowed itself to change. To become what the dreamer pictured in the mind. Occasionally it would escape the forms only to be shoved and pushed back into the spot it had vacated. Large mounds became mice and frogs. Castles emerged. Bridges and churches evolved. Whatever the dreamer imagined became real.
The atmosphere was festive. Spectators wandered up and down the line of creators and creations. Everyone talked about their favorite. Cameras and phones snapped pictures to show to those who were not in attendance. Questions were asked of the workers. What tools were they allowed to use? How long before the tide washed the wonders away? Did they mourn the devestation as they watched their creations destroyed?
It allowed itself to change. My goodness. What a lesson for us all. If something as simple as sand has the ability to become a majestic castle, then what are the possibilities for the human race? One grain of sand added to another grain of sand and another has the ability to become something wonderful. We humans have the same ability. We live on this planet together, and together we have the ability to become something majestic. When we work toward a worthy goal that blesses the lives of others, we create something wonderful. For that to happen, cooperation is necessary.
Ten people were allowed inside the designated area for creating a sand castle. Only ten. Those ten people knew their jobs. They knew what had to be accomplished. They understood their role in the creative process. Each concentrated on their part. With knives and turkey basters, they manipulated the sand. It became paint in their hands. Ten people working toward the same goal. No arguing about whose part was the most important. No bickering about needing help. No fussing about being too tired to continue. Only happy faces. Faces concentrating. Examining their work. Changing when change was necessary.
And I thought that is how good gets accomplished. One person shares a dream with another. Then another learns and joins. Soon the original dream is better because more people are involved. Ideas are shared. Questions are asked. Everyone works toward the shared goal. People with different backgrounds, different ideas, different experiences joining together because they know that together more can be accomplished. Being part of a group that brightens the planet is joyful.
If one grain of sand has the power to become something much bigger by joining other grains of sand, what does that say to us? To those of us who have the ability to work together? Who see situations everyday that need change? Who have more than we need yet continue to strive for more? Who fill our lives with good but possibly not the best? What holds us back? Do we need a form just like the sand to hold us together as we strive to make our space on this planet better? Something beautiful? Do we believe that our time has come and gone? We all have to answer these and other questions for ourselves. Is sand ever too old to become something changed? Something different?
It is true. Grains of sand do not change unless they are forced. People are sometimes like that, too. It is a simple thing to become complacent. To be so satisfied with ourselves and our lives that we fail to see the obvious. That we are but one grain of sand amid thousands. As I walked among the large crowds of people watching the magic happen, I was so aware of how alike we all are. People were talking together. Holding the hands of children. Laughing at shared stories. Visiting with strangers. And I thought how wonderful it was to see all the different nationalities together enjoying the day.
I walked away from the festivities with a full heart. I felt hopeful for our world. Hopeful that all of us living together on this planet have the ability to be changed. To be transformed into something wonderful. It all depends on the forms we allow to shape us. And our ability to allow ourselves to become something new.
Tuesday, June 9, 2015
The Celebration
The Celebration-
What is it that people want out of this life? What makes people smile, giggle, laugh out loud? The answers are all over the board. What pleases one may not make any sense to another. What tickles one may seem super silly to others. That means it is difficult to make a list that would answer those questions.
However, I would like to take a shot at some possible responses. Let's begin with the first question. What do people want out of life? Actually the answer is quite simple. Most desire a job that pays enough to have a home, enough to pay the bills and buy groceries. A little left over for fun activities. Maybe a ballgame. Or an occasional concert. Enough to take that special someone to dinner. Or the kids for ice cream on a hot, muggy day.
Other possibilities include someone to share life with. Someone to listen without judgment. Someone to hold when storms surround. Someone to appreciate and respect our accomplishments. To welcome us home. To share special times. And, of course, dear friends. What would this life be like without those special folks who brighten our life simply by walking into our space. Those people who love us even when we are most unloveable. Who rejoice in our victories and cry with us when our lives fall apart. These folk fill the void that often overwhelms us. And when we are at our lowest point, they remind us that we are worthy. That we have much to give. That it isn't always about us.
These are the people who celebrated our 50th with us. These precious people who share pieces of our lives. Together we have made many memories. We have taken trips together, attended concerts and graduations, accompained choirs, borrowed reading glasses, cried together when life hurt. These are the ones who brighten our day. Who laugh with us until our sides are sore. This wonderfully diverse group of people fill us up. Each brings something quite unique to our relationship.
So, yes, we celebrated our 50th anniversary this weekend. Fifty years with one person. Quite a feat in today's world. Ups and downs. Laughter and tears. Anger and quiet. Compassion and no compassion. All the emotions that make us human merged together. Yet, we have held steady. We have worked through challenging times. When I look back, I can honestly say it has been good. So good.
We had a party. Invited friends and family. Worked and worked in our yard. Tended the plant beds. Added compost. Trimmed shrubs-all except the ones with nests. Those are quite overgrown now. We painted the deck. Planted flowers. Mopped the floors. Dusted the furniture. Ordered good food. Bought wine. Lots of wine. We hoped for a sunny day. Even a cloudy one. However, that was not to be.
As time drew near for the party to begin, clouds began to turn that dark shade of blue that signals a storm. So we took the party inside. Folks visited. I remember laughter. And then the sky opened and the rains came. Over an inch of liquid sunshine. We continued to party. A bolt of lightening caused a car alarm to start. The owner turned it off inside the house. At some point I realized the house was much hotter than it should be. When the bolt of lightening turned the car alarm on, it must have done something to the air conditioner. Yes, repairs were necessary. Expensive repairs. Yet, the party continued.
At one point I heard my piano. Someone was playing. Downstairs I hurried. There I found my friend entertaining guests. Nothing to do but join her on the bench. We played three hands for quite a little bit. Such fun. Such memories of us playing in church. I admit I was a bit rusty, but kept up most of the time. A few choice words did escape my lips as I worked to keep up with her. She is a wonderful pianist. I am average. Together we make it work.
More rain as people began to leave. While most drove off our lawn and onto the road with no problem, a couple became stuck in the mud. Mud that wasn't there when they arrived. Mud that presented itself as the rains poured from the sky. Husband retrieved the Kabota and chain and wearing rain gear and boots, began to pull people onto the driveway. Not exactly what we had in mind for our party. Memories!
One vehicle was in too deep. Time to call a tow truck. Is that what you call it? Anyway, it took quite a long time for it to arrive. After much work, the car was successfully pulled to the driveway, and the poor people finally got to depart our yard. The party continued. And as it continued, I thought about what people truly want.
It is my belief that people want love, respect and acceptance more than anything money could buy. People want the warmth of a smile when others see them. They want a friendly greeting. They need to know that others enjoy their company. None of these can be bought. Not with cash, check or credit card. These things come from the heart. These things are given away to others from hearts full of gratitude for life itself. Filling our lives with friends and family makes our life worth something. Walking through my house watching and listening to those who came to celebrate with us, I was reminded again how precious life is. How grand it is to share life with others. I saw eyes sparkle and shine with lovely greetings. I heard laughter floating across the rooms. What delight. What absolute delight.
Yes, I truly believe that what we all need is a large dose--a tablespoon full-of love. Of acceptance. Of respect. Heaped up and overflowing so that our joy in living touches all those we meet. I felt those things in my home. I felt loved. I felt respected. I felt accepted. Those are the things I wish for others to feel. To know that they are valued.
Eventually the evening ended. People were hugged and thanked for helping us celebrate our special day. Dishes were stacked for another day. Cards were read again. Gifts were placed with cards ready for thank-you's to be written. Exhausted, we made our way to bed. Naturally sleep did not come. I was way too excited to allow myself to fall to sleep. I wanted to remember it all. To relive moments with people. To be grateful for it all.
We are so blessed. We made memories with delightful people who call us friend. What more could we possibly ask?
What is it that people want out of this life? What makes people smile, giggle, laugh out loud? The answers are all over the board. What pleases one may not make any sense to another. What tickles one may seem super silly to others. That means it is difficult to make a list that would answer those questions.
However, I would like to take a shot at some possible responses. Let's begin with the first question. What do people want out of life? Actually the answer is quite simple. Most desire a job that pays enough to have a home, enough to pay the bills and buy groceries. A little left over for fun activities. Maybe a ballgame. Or an occasional concert. Enough to take that special someone to dinner. Or the kids for ice cream on a hot, muggy day.
Other possibilities include someone to share life with. Someone to listen without judgment. Someone to hold when storms surround. Someone to appreciate and respect our accomplishments. To welcome us home. To share special times. And, of course, dear friends. What would this life be like without those special folks who brighten our life simply by walking into our space. Those people who love us even when we are most unloveable. Who rejoice in our victories and cry with us when our lives fall apart. These folk fill the void that often overwhelms us. And when we are at our lowest point, they remind us that we are worthy. That we have much to give. That it isn't always about us.
These are the people who celebrated our 50th with us. These precious people who share pieces of our lives. Together we have made many memories. We have taken trips together, attended concerts and graduations, accompained choirs, borrowed reading glasses, cried together when life hurt. These are the ones who brighten our day. Who laugh with us until our sides are sore. This wonderfully diverse group of people fill us up. Each brings something quite unique to our relationship.
So, yes, we celebrated our 50th anniversary this weekend. Fifty years with one person. Quite a feat in today's world. Ups and downs. Laughter and tears. Anger and quiet. Compassion and no compassion. All the emotions that make us human merged together. Yet, we have held steady. We have worked through challenging times. When I look back, I can honestly say it has been good. So good.
We had a party. Invited friends and family. Worked and worked in our yard. Tended the plant beds. Added compost. Trimmed shrubs-all except the ones with nests. Those are quite overgrown now. We painted the deck. Planted flowers. Mopped the floors. Dusted the furniture. Ordered good food. Bought wine. Lots of wine. We hoped for a sunny day. Even a cloudy one. However, that was not to be.
As time drew near for the party to begin, clouds began to turn that dark shade of blue that signals a storm. So we took the party inside. Folks visited. I remember laughter. And then the sky opened and the rains came. Over an inch of liquid sunshine. We continued to party. A bolt of lightening caused a car alarm to start. The owner turned it off inside the house. At some point I realized the house was much hotter than it should be. When the bolt of lightening turned the car alarm on, it must have done something to the air conditioner. Yes, repairs were necessary. Expensive repairs. Yet, the party continued.
At one point I heard my piano. Someone was playing. Downstairs I hurried. There I found my friend entertaining guests. Nothing to do but join her on the bench. We played three hands for quite a little bit. Such fun. Such memories of us playing in church. I admit I was a bit rusty, but kept up most of the time. A few choice words did escape my lips as I worked to keep up with her. She is a wonderful pianist. I am average. Together we make it work.
More rain as people began to leave. While most drove off our lawn and onto the road with no problem, a couple became stuck in the mud. Mud that wasn't there when they arrived. Mud that presented itself as the rains poured from the sky. Husband retrieved the Kabota and chain and wearing rain gear and boots, began to pull people onto the driveway. Not exactly what we had in mind for our party. Memories!
One vehicle was in too deep. Time to call a tow truck. Is that what you call it? Anyway, it took quite a long time for it to arrive. After much work, the car was successfully pulled to the driveway, and the poor people finally got to depart our yard. The party continued. And as it continued, I thought about what people truly want.
It is my belief that people want love, respect and acceptance more than anything money could buy. People want the warmth of a smile when others see them. They want a friendly greeting. They need to know that others enjoy their company. None of these can be bought. Not with cash, check or credit card. These things come from the heart. These things are given away to others from hearts full of gratitude for life itself. Filling our lives with friends and family makes our life worth something. Walking through my house watching and listening to those who came to celebrate with us, I was reminded again how precious life is. How grand it is to share life with others. I saw eyes sparkle and shine with lovely greetings. I heard laughter floating across the rooms. What delight. What absolute delight.
Yes, I truly believe that what we all need is a large dose--a tablespoon full-of love. Of acceptance. Of respect. Heaped up and overflowing so that our joy in living touches all those we meet. I felt those things in my home. I felt loved. I felt respected. I felt accepted. Those are the things I wish for others to feel. To know that they are valued.
Eventually the evening ended. People were hugged and thanked for helping us celebrate our special day. Dishes were stacked for another day. Cards were read again. Gifts were placed with cards ready for thank-you's to be written. Exhausted, we made our way to bed. Naturally sleep did not come. I was way too excited to allow myself to fall to sleep. I wanted to remember it all. To relive moments with people. To be grateful for it all.
We are so blessed. We made memories with delightful people who call us friend. What more could we possibly ask?
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