Curbs and Barriers

Curbs and Barriers--


Curbs are important.  They provide guidance.  They tell us that we have come to the end of a parking space.  They basically tell us to stop.  Since they are constructed of cement, they mean what they say.

Now, usually I respect curbs.  I know they are there for a purpose.  However, every once in awhile things go a tad wrong.  Once I was upset with a service department.  They parked my little yellow bug against a long, rectangular cement parking barrier--a curb.  Well, I didn't see that barrier.  I should have put the bug in reverse.  I didn't.  I put it in drive.  Naturally I hit that barrier.  There was a choice involved at that point.  Back up or drive over it.  I drove forward.  Was a bit of a rough ride for a little bit until the back wheels cleared that thing.  No doubt men were watching with amazement.  Probably men from the service department as well as salesmen.  I held my head up high as I made my way to the street.  I meant to do it that way.

Then there is the time I drove over a railroad tie.  I was doing home bound tutoring.  Again, I was in a bug.  I saw the railroad ties in the front yard.  Actually thought I would miss them.  Alas, I didn't.  That time I hung the car over the ties.  Had to call my husband at work to come and remove the car which was suspended just a bit.  He is a very patient man.

The last encounter I had with a barrier/curb was tonight.  Our grandson plays on a baseball team.  They were playing for the win in a tournament.  When we arrived, all of the parking spaces that one pulls into were taken.  There was a cement rectangular block at the end of each space.  Beyond the pull- in spaces was a place where you could pull a car beside the barrier.  All I had to do was drive the car beside the barrier--not into it.  Easy.  Done it a million times.  But not a million and one.

I pulled too close to the cement barrier and drove for a tiny bit on top of it.  That would not have been any big deal except there was about six inches between the end of one barrier and the beginning of the next.  Instead of driving off, I drove straight.  We went down just a bit, and then hit the top of the next one.  I think there was a small hissing sound.  It's hard to tell from inside the car, you know.  We unloaded the car--chairs, a blanket, water.

We walked down to the ball field, opened the chairs and began to make our nest.  After a bit my husband decided to go to the store for peanuts.  I stayed in my chair.

Several minutes came and went.  It certainly was taking a long time to get those peanuts, I thought.  Eventually he returned.  I noticed that his hands were really dirty.  Almost black.  They were perfectly clean when he left on the trip for peanuts.   Maybe he stopped to help some little old lady with a flat tire.  He is that kind of guy.

He said after he left the parking lot, he heard a thud, thud, thud sound.  He was able to manuver the car into a bank lot.  Guess what he discovered?  You are correct.  A flat tire.  In about ten minutes he had it off, and the spare installed.

Trying to squirm out of blame, I suggested that the makers of the barriers had made a mistake in design.  Each barrier has a sharp edge.  It would have been much safer to have rounded those edges.  And why were they separated by six or more inches?  Why not butt them up against one another?  Had they been installed end to end, I could have driven off with no problem.  Yes, it was definitely a design flaw.

It seems the four inch hole in the tire cannot be repaired.  Guess we will need to purchase a new tire.  Just last weekend we had to have the car towed due to a dead battery.   Do things really come in threes??

Yep--Life Changes!

Yep--Life Changes!


 Everyday we make plans.   We say we will do this or that tomorrow or next week.  That is life happening.  We assume our lives will continue uninterrupted.  We forget that everything in life is subject to change in an instant.  Accidents happen.  Illiness arrives.  Jobs disappear. Someone we love moves away to another city or state.  Death brings us to our knees.  These and other changes force us to evaluate everything we hold dear.

How we approach these happenings says so much about who we are, and what we believe.  I don't think there is a right or wrong way to deal with the experiences of life.  I have not walked that mile in your shoes so how could I pass judgement on your way of dealing with life?  Being critical of others does nothing to build relationships.  Criticism separates.  It leaves chasms that often cannot be crossed. When people say they are playing the devil's advocate, what they really mean is they are exercising their right to be critical.  Why not simply say there is disagreement and continue the conversation?

I so enjoy being around people who get a kick out of life.  No agenda.  Just living.  When bad things happen to them, they seem to have the ability to take it in stride.   They possess an inner strength that is like a second skin.  They wear it all the time.  They are never without it.  And when challenges come to others, they are there to support.  That support does not include giving advice.  They understand that everyone has to walk their own walk.  Their outstretched hand tells everyone who they are.  Their love and care is genuine, and everyone knows it.

I have been an observer and participant in the challenges of life.  Each of these has provided me with valuable information.  As an observer I have watched and listened to others as they navigated the muddy waters of life trying to find firm footing.  As a participant I have questioned the whys of life.  Why do people get sick?  Why do those folks who do good suffer so much?  Why is life so hard for some and so easy for others?  Actually, I don't think life is easy for anyone.  Even those who seem to have it all experience the same emotions that the rest of us do.  Life can be hard.  And it can be wonderful--sometimes in the same day.

Faith gives me the strength to face my tomorrows.  When I visit with the Spirit,  there is a peace that comes.  It envelops.  It may not provide the answers I need for the whys of life, but I know that there is a way forward.  It is not a crutch that I lean on.  It is a source of power that I feel down deep in my bones.  It is personal for me.  Some understand this.  Others may not.

I will continue to make plans.  The bathroom remodel will be completed.  Time with friends will happen.  Study will continue.  Someone dear to me will experience pain.  I will be there to help carry that burden.  Loss will occur.  Life will change.  This is the reality we live with everyday.  Even though we are aware that challenge will come, let's continue to make the plans to help those in need, to listen to others, to love more deeply, to be less critical, to practice kindness every opportunity we get,  to laugh out loud, to sing happy songs, to put that bounce in our step.

Who knows?  Someone may be watching us.  Watching how we handle the ups and downs of life.  We may be the light for someone.  Certainly we have all had someone be a light for us.  We are in this mess together.  It is a good mess even when pain arrives.

Life is uncertain.  That is a given.   We will win, and we will lose.  The lessons we learn along our journey are the building blocks of our character.  Let us be about building our lives one brick at a time adding joy, love and understanding to those who share our space.







 

Correct Coffee Shop Attire

Correct Coffee Shop Attire--



For years I have been visiting coffee shops.  Love the atmosphere.  Love the coffee.  Everyone is friendly, and the mood is congenial.  Usually there is a selection of food items, tea and coffee.  Magazines on a rack for enjoyment.  Many tables and chairs where people can pass time visiting, talking and reading.   In one particular coffee shop I watched a man tutor a child in the art of chess.  Connections are made between employer and possible employee.  Coffee shops are the place to be for just about everything.

When I visit my favorite coffee shop, I usually take along a book that I am reading and a notebook for jotting down ideas for writing.  However, I don't feel I really belong.  You see, there is a particular look that is required for truly belonging in a coffee shop.  Figured it out yet?

I observe most people bent over watching the screen while their fingers are busy poking those keys to make words.  Yes, the computer is required gear for a coffee shop.  Today I feel like I am among the  in-group because I have the computer setting in front of me, and  my fingers are dancing across the keys.  It really doesn't matter what I am doing.  This silver magic box means I belong in this shop at this table.  I feel included.   I am among those who conduct important business while sitting having coffee.  Well, that might not be the truth exactly.  More often than not, I am reading my emails and checking my bank balance.  But I belong--yes, I do.

I remember how it felt when I didn't know how to get connected to the internet at coffee shops.  Sometimes I would ask for help.  Not being computer literate, the directions would usually fly right through one ear and out the other.  I tried to look like I understood.  Don't think I fooled anyone.  You could almost see the sympathy in their eyes.  One person even came over to me and asked if he could help.  You simply have to swallow your pride and be grateful for the kindness of strangers.  Now, I am very proud to say, I am able to connect to the internet just about anywhere.  What a delicious feeling.

Yes, this little silver tablet is my friend.  It goes with me almost everywhere.  It travels well.  And it keeps me in the loop.  Who could want more??

Happy computing!

Good Morning

Good Morning!



Good Morning!  May this day be the day you have been waiting for.  May it bring you love.  May it forget to bring anything that might cause you pain.  May you walk in the knowledge that you are loved beyond words.  And may you love others with all your heart.

Take care.

Peaches--Like Us?

Peaches--Like Us?



Peach time is almost here.  Peaches are my absolute favorite fruit.  I love everything about them.  The colors, the texture, the feel, the smell and, of course, the taste.  Filling the freezer with peach jam is a favorite activity around this house.  Nothing is better than frozen peach jam on a hot biscuit or toast.  Especially in winter.

My one regret about peaches is the season is so short and can be thwarted by frost in spring.  Once the blossoms cover the trees, everyone watches the weather report praying that the temperature remains above freezing.  There isn't much one can do should a frost threaten.  If everything in nature goes well, the fruit ripens.  It is glorious.  What fun to visit a peach orchard and pick your own.

Now, there is one thing that everyone learns about peaches.  It can cause a bit of saddness.  Those peaches ripen quickly.  Once they are off the tree and in a bowl on the counter, that chemistry thing begins to happen.  They look so pretty on the side that is turned out.  However, on the underside of the peaches, the darkness, change is happening.  Where they touch one another, a small spot begins to form.  If left alone and not eaten on cereal or with milk, that spot will spread to other peaches.  And then when we decide to enjoy one, we discover only half is good.  The other half is rotten.  We only make that mistake once.  The lesson is learned.  We need to keep the peaches separated from one another.

There might be a life application here.  Work with me as I try to explain.

We begin life with the promise of greatness.  Greatness has many definitions.  We all won't be President, but we all can do the right things to support our families and those around us.  We all can take note of situations where we can offer help and change life for others.  We all have within us the power and wonder to make a true difference in this wonderful world.  However, we also have the ability to be influenced by others.  Even though we know the path we should travel, it is easy to be sucked into the world of another.  Maybe it looks more glamorous.  Perhaps there is a hole in our hearts, and someone else happens along and takes us on a journey that seems good.  We almost always know the journeys that are right for us, don't we?  But, we have choice.  We make decisions everyday about the direction of our lives.  I think that is a very good thing.  Choice.  We will absolutely not make all the right decisions in our lives.  We are human.  If we think we are always right and that our way is always best, we are only fooling ourselves.  Everyone who knows us knows the truth that we cannot see.

So, all of that to say this.  The influence of those in our circle is great.  We influence others as well.  We  "touch" one another.  Maybe not physically but certainly in other ways.  I think about young people who are so easily influenced to try drugs or alcohol or sex.  Those things that will certainly take them down a different path from what might be best.  It looks so good and such fun on the outside, but it has a dark side.  That dark side has the power to change us forever.   Does the dark side make us rotten?  No, I don't think so.  But it does tend to spread over us.  Overtake our ability to make the best choices.  Sidetrack our lives.  Cause hurt to those who love us most.  Living with a dark side happens to adults as well.

Like peaches, maybe we should examine who and what we are "against" during our days on this earth. Our decisions must be made thoughtfully and carefully.  Please understand that I am not saying we develop a "I am better than you because I make better decisions" attitude.  We must not stand in judgement over others.  But, we do have that thing called choice.  We can remain true to ourselves and still care for others.  And sometimes our own attitudes can use an adjustment.  Much harder to see ourselves honestly than to "see" someone else.

Even though peaches are so easily influenced by those in the basket with them, I love them to pieces!

Positive or Negative?

Positive or Negative--


Let's visit about all the positives in our lives.  Heaven knows, we hear much about the negatives in this world.  This is written from my viewpoint--which is subject to change without my knowing it!:).  Hopefully, you can take from what I share and apply it to your own life and situation.

My heart hurts for those who have been damaged by life.  Actually, we all have.  No one lives on this earth without experiencing a fair amount of negatives.  Sometimes it comes from our upbringing.  Other times it comes from those we meet and form relationships with.  It can arrive on our doorstep through those who have control over us in the workplace.  You name the  place-negatives can be found.

So, it requires a new mindset to turn those negatives into positives.  This is difficult work.  We are the sum total of all our experiences.  Those experiences that were hurtful tend to hang around in our heads much longer than those positive affirmations we receive.  I have never understood that dynamic.  The ability to reverse trends means we have made the choice to no longer be the victim.  How wonderful that is.  It may mean that our mind is in a good place when negatives arrive on our scene.  That good place allows us to move beyond the negative.  It allows us to know that we are of value, and that we don't need another person to tell us.  We know it from the inside out.

Remember--I am writing from my place in this world.

A huge positive in my life is the ability to make choices.  Sometimes the choices are shallow--what color shall I paint the new bathroom.  Shall we use stone instead of ceramic?  Where shall I plant that new bush?  Shall I do the laundry today or tomorrow?  Shall I mop the floor or clean the blinds this week or next?  Those types of choices give me the feeling of control.  I get to make the choice if and when I will start or complete the choices that make up my world.

Other choices have a much deeper ring to them.  Shall I phone a friend?  Shall I pray about a situation that is hurtful?  Shall I hug a person who needs the human touch?  Shall I extend myself to a new person?  Shall I do the very hard work of evaluating my own beliefs with the intent of making changes should I find some that are not working for me or anyone else?  Shall I be open to new ideas that are quite different from those I have had for a long time?  Shall I listen?

To my mind, all of the above are positive.  They all mean change for the better can be on the way if I allow it to happen.  It seems to me we all hold on tightly to some things that we should let go.  It is a very positive action when we take a hurt and allow it to drift away on the wind.  When the person on the other end of the phone answers and recognizes our voice, the joy that is heard is so very positive.  We have no idea how many people are in a place of need.  Sometimes they sit at the next desk.  Sometimes they live next door.  Maybe they are way across country.  If we are honest, we are in that place of need, too.  What a positive feeling we receive when we reach out from the comfort of our own scheduled lives and touch another.

A positive attitude spreads to everyone.  It is like sunlight.  It goes everywhere.  Sunlight doesn't make choices where to shine.  It just does.  We all benefit from the warmth it brings.  Sure, summer can be a bit hot, but where would we be without the sun?  Our positive attitude spreads like that.  Others can be caught up in our joy and feel a sense of lightness, too.  What about those negative folks we find in residence around us?  Well, they may always be that way.  But, that doesn't mean that they get to determine my attitude.  Or your attitude.  Being positive doesn't mean we don't recognize negatives.  It means we have made the choice about the direction our life will take.  Easy?  No.  Possible?  Yes.

Sometimes I simply want to lash out at those who are negative.  How much fun it would be to speak those words that are lurking just below the surface of my mind.  Boy--could I fix them!  It can take all the strength of character we have to refrain from responding in a negative manner.  We hear one voice in our head telling us to go ahead--give it to them!  And then there is that other voice that is almost a whisper.  It reminds us that being positive brings more goodness into the world.  What do we do?  Lash out or wait and think?  What have you done in that situation?  We have probably been on both sides of that fence.  We don't have to live on the negative side, do we?  We need to climb the fence and plant our feet on the positive side.

Friends, family, faith, a place to live, a husband/wife, a partner, a job, enough food with some to share, a loving spirit, the ability to turn a wrong into a right, looking at the earth as our precious habitat and desiring to make it better, taking care of the business that comes into view everyday, being trustworthy, being dependable--all of these and so much more are the positives of our lives.

When you have time, make a list of the positives in your life.  Get several sheets of paper!  You will need them.  Delve deeply into your life.  Look beyond the obvious.  And then take another sheet and list the negatives.  My guess is this list will be much shorter.  That should get your attention.  Determine if you are giving more time and energy to the negatives than the positives.  Then go about making the necessary changes that will bring more positive energy into your life.  Everyone will benefit from this activity.

Now, I am positively going to get dressed and do something fun!  Talk again soon.

Sing Your Own Song

Sing Your Own Song--


The morning is beautiful.  Cloudy just enough to make the greens vibrant.  A few roses are blooming.  Birds are chattering away about what only birds know.  A few ground squirrels are skittering here and there.  Grass is wet from a shower.  Weeds are sure they are plants that I truly love and want in my gardens.  They can live a bit longer.

A wild turkey visits the bird feeders everyday eating the seeds that are scattered by the birds.  Wild turkeys are quite large.  When it has finished with its meal, it returns to the woods.  Guess we are the restaurant.

Sometimes I don't take time to really look at nature and life.  The interesting thing is it happens whether I am watchful or not.  Time simply moves on to the next moment, the next day.  While I am busy with whatever, life is lived.  My dad told me once that while he was so busy trying to make a living, he never saw the flowers that bloomed along the roadway.  He said beauty was always there, but he never took even a moment to observe it.

We all understand that, don't we?  Houses need to be cleaned, laundry done, lawns tended--all significant things in life.  Children need our care and love.  Committees demand our time. Jobs that we are so grateful to have require our full attention.  Our moments are eaten up with activities that are good.  Certainly we don't want a dirty house or piles of laundry.  Nor do we want our lawns to be overgrown.  We desire to be good stewards of the blessings of our lives. Yet, we go from one activity to another feeling worn down by life. We complain about all the items on our plate.  But, we know that deep inside, we love all the hustle and bustle.  It makes us feel alive.

The rhythm of life keeps the music flowing.   That song we sing each day is the song of our life.  It tells our story.  When a friend asks what is happening in our world, we sing that song to them.  We invite them into our song.  We may even add a verse for them.  The song we sing has many verses.  Some are delightful.  Others tender.  But, as long as we are alive, we continue singing our song.

Take a few moments to sing your song today.  Let your heart fill with gratitude.  Allow your life to be touched by a person, an experience.  Open yourself to whatever happens to enter your private space.

Sing your song proudly!