With Fear and Trembling

With Fear and Trembling-

There are many frightening moments in life.  Moments that immobolize us.  That stop us in our tracks.
Moments that cause us to put off that which must happen.  That which is as important as that next breath.  Eventually, we conquer our fear and slither off to that place of dread.  We quietly open the door and peek inside taking in all the elements of the room.  The paint color, the arrangement of furniture, the "feel" of the space.  We observe other people.  We keep our guard up as we have no idea what the outcome will be.

Yep! We are meeting a new hairdresser for the first time.

Nothing causes the stomach to churn more than leaving the trusted one who keeps our hair looking its best.  It is a painful experience to say goodbye to that person who knows our hair.  Who knows us. Who understands that we like a certain look.  Who has perfected that look and executes it everytime we visit their salon.  This person knows our deepest secrets.  Knows our joys and sorrows.  Knows our dreams.  And we know theirs.  We share on an intimate level all of life.  And then one of us moves.  Panic floods us.  Who can we turn to?  Who can we trust?

This morning I visited a salon in a new city for the first time.  When I phoned for an appointment, I was asked who I preferred.  Well, she is over two-thousand miles away.  I replied that anyone in the salon would be fine.  I was given to Shelby.  Was Shelby young or old?  Was she new at hair cuts or a veteran?  Did she understand how to work with fine hair?  Hair grows.  That is such a comfort.  No matter what I walked out with, it would change over the course of a few days.

Shelby was at the desk when I arrived.  Young!  Ok.  This may work out well.  She had long black hair that was truly beautiful.  Her make-up was perfect, and she greeted me with a lovely smile.  After I introduced myself, she said I was hers.  She led me to her chair where we talked about what I wanted.  I should have said I want you to make me beautiful, but I fear she would have asked me to leave.  After all, she does hair.  She doesn't perform miracles.

Following our discussion she began the process.  I liked her style.  She was funny and gave me the opportunity to see the back before she declared it finished.  I appreciated the opportunity for feed-back. During the course of the cut, I noticed a very small arrow tattoo on her arm.  I asked if it had special significance for her.  Yes, it did.  I loved what she shared with me.

She said that an arrow always moves in a forward motion.  Since I don't remember her exact words, I will try to convey her meaning in my words.  She said the only time an arrow moves backward is when it is put in a bow and moved back so that it can be propelled in a foward motion.  That forward motion of the arrow is a picture of her life.  She went on to say that for years she was held captive by other's thoughts and feelings towards her.  She was not able to let go of things that were said.  She was stuck in one spot.  But, and I don't know what that one thing was that moved her out of that challenge, one day she realized that she was enough.  And that her life needed to move forward according to her dreams.  She determined she was not going to allow others to rain on that parade that belonged to her.  She would let go of the things that in the past had brought her down and focus on the positive.  She would move forward to that which awaits and brings her joy.

I loved her spirit.  I loved her humor.  And I loved the haircut.

When it was time to leave, we hugged.  I think we both knew that we had been blessed to be together for a moment in time.  I will return for a trim before this trip ends.  Honestly, I want to visit with her again and learn more about her journey.

It could have all turned out so differently.  I could have purchased a wig and hidden under it for months while my hair grew back.  I could have walked away with tears and frustration.  But, I walked away feeling like I had made a friend.  And my hair was absolutely perfect!