Final Thoughts on Relationships

Final Thoughts on Relationships--

Bottom line about relationships is this.  We can gather something from them all.

It is possible to learn from even the worst relationships.  Those that are difficult teach us to spend time enjoying our lives.  They remind us that we have choice.  We get to decide who enters our space.  And even though we may allow someone to walk through the door of our lives, should that turn out to be a little less than we want, we can close that same door.  It is wise to do it kindly.  No slams.  Just a quiet and gentle closing of the door.  Relationships that cause anxiety affect our entire being.  They cause us worry and pain.  We spend time trying to figure out why things went south.  Sometimes things simply don't work out as we hoped or planned.  When that occurs, it is best to let go and move on.

Then there are those who stay. They laugh with us.  They share life with us.  We hang out  together in coffee shops and work through life challenges.  We talk about nothing.  And it is fun.  We walk through the difficult times of life together.  Our radar is up for any ways we can help one another.  We value time spent together.  We talk about memories and laugh about the silly things we have done together.  These are the people we grow old with.  They are family.

When a relationship ends, time is needed to work through all the emotions that flood our lives.  If that has happened to you, allow the grief to work its way out of your heart.  This may take time.  But, as each day passes, the pain will grow less and the anticipation of something new and better will begin to take seed in your life.  I love it that there are so many new people to know.  Who knows when a person will appear and bring newness to your life!

Relationships are tricky things.  Left alone they slowly disappear from view.  And one day we realize that we have failed to nuture something so important to us.  It is never too late to call, email, write, visit.  It is never too late to tell that person that they are missed.  It is never too late to say you are sorry for not tending the friendship.

We are designed to be in relationships.  Everyone needs love and care.  Everyone needs to know that they are valued.  Everyone needs to receive a hug everyday and to give one in return.  Our kitchen is a galley kitchen.  You walk through it to get everywhere in our house.  When our son was still at home, I would tell him that any boy who walked through my kitchen got a hug.  He would laugh and try to run through the kitchen.  I always caught him.  I would hug on him, and we would laugh.  I do that with my grandchildren sometimes.  Such a simple thing to let others know they are loved.  Why do we withhold that affection that we all need?  I do not have an answer to that.  But what I do know is everyone needs to know they are special to someone.  Nothing takes the place of the human touch.

Each person who enters our life brings something new to us.  Not everyone will be a match with us.  But everyone can teach us a little about ourselves.  Bottom line is this.  Take good care of those relationships that are important to you.  Tell those special people that you are glad to share life with them.  Show a little affection.  The world is difficult enough.  We need a place of comfort and support.  We find that in our primary relationships.

I have said it before.  I will say it again.  Life is short.  Don't waste time on things that have no meaning.  Instead spend more time realizing that love is the greatest gift.  Give that gift with gusto!