Untold Stories

Untold Stories-

In the secret places of my life, there are countless untold stories.  Why will they remain untold?  One reason they will remain held close is I refuse to be the one responsible for heart attacks.  Gasps- yes, I can handle that.  But shock-well, no.

So now you are wondering exactly what those untold stories are, aren't you?  You are picturing different scenarios.  Even imagining where, when, what.  Maybe a thought comes to your mind, but you quickly dismiss it because you can't believe that could be one of my untold stories.  You move on to the next possibility.  When we meet, you listen for any clues in conversation shared.

Let's get real.  Everyone has untold stories.  Everyone has dreams that have been smashed by good-hearted people who have no clue what you wish, or even who you are.  Your secret place is the repository for all those untold stories.  Only you hold the key.  Even the key is hidden.  What if someone actually found it and unlocked that door?  Can't allow that to happen.  You and only you have access to that door.  That key is yours.  Should you allow another beyond that door, it will be because they have earned your trust.  Perhaps they have had similar life experiences so you feel they will understand.  Even so, trust comes slowly.

Life throws so much at us.  Daily we are given choices.  Which ones we choose will direct our future.    Not all choices carry the same weight.  Some are easy and light.  Which food to choose off that huge menu, what shoes make our feet look smaller, which colors show off our eyes.  Those are simple choices.  Then there are those choices that are heavy.  They leave us drained. How to pay bills, which one can be left for the next month, who is the best doctor for our particular illness.  These are difficult.  If challenging choices haven't smacked you in the face yet, wait a little bit longer.  Wish I could say everything in your life will be peachy keen, but the human experience extends its arms to all of us. How we walk through these times is our choice.

I do believe that choice drives us.  However, there are times when that word seems a bit simplistic.  Life comes at us from all sides.  Just when we think we have made all the right choices, we are bombarded with unexpected challenges.  We don't always get to choose the path life puts in front of us.  Often we find ourselves adrift in the middle of the river with no paddle to get us to shore.  Even more-we don't have a boat to sit in as we paddle toward safety.  We feel lost and afraid.  Yet, even amid circumstances that threaten, we dig deep.  We push that paddle deeper into the water and make our way to safety.  One steady stroke after the other.

Times like these fill us with untold stories.  We hold those thoughts and fears inside.  We put on that facade and move through life.  We say all the right things and do all the right things.  We are fine. At least that is what we tell others.  We don't want to bother others with the real story.  They might find us difficult or different from the way they see us.  Too much at stake.  Keep it light.  Keep it simple.

A benefit of untold stories is we identify with others.  We don't have to share our story to feel their pain or disappointment.  We have been on that path.  We know.  And because we have walked that same path, we can offer understanding.  No judgement.  Simply care.  A listening ear.  A pat on a back.  A hug.

Not all untold stories are negative or worrisome.  Some are happy.  Joyful.  We keep those close for the moments when we need that little boost.  We smile and laugh aloud when we remember.  It is delightful to have those moments to shove us down the path.  To pucker those lips and whistle a tune along the journey.  These stories allow us to connect with others who are having good times.  To be energized.  Smiling eyes looking into smiling eyes.  What joy.

Untold stories are part of everyone's life.  They help us understand this journey we are all on.  My path will differ from yours as will yours differ from mine.  We all feel pain, fear, despair, disappointment.  It is my hope that we all also feel joy, love, care.  On this journey we may pass one another.  We may stop and share a bit before we move along.  We may pull deep inside until we have the strength to take that next step on the path of our life.  What we need to remember is we are all on the same journey.  We begin.  We end.  It is what we do with the middle that tells our story.

Will I share my untold stories with you?  Probably not.  At least not until we have sat together and shared.  Not until we have cried and laughed together.  Not until we have connected in a deep and meaningful way.  Even then it may be very difficult.  Not impossible-just difficult.

Life isn't over.  Many more untold stories to store in my secret place.  Don't you dare search for that key!

Refreshed

Refreshed--

It is raining.  Beautiful rain.  Much needed rain.  The land will be refreshed.  People will feel relief from the heat.  All is good this morning as the lovely drops fall from the sky.

Refreshed.  What a wonderful word.  It speaks to me of new beginnings.  Perhaps not starting over with everything in our lives, but certainly moving forward with new hope.  Life can drag it out of us. All the responsibilities that accompany adulthood tend to overwhelm.  People with needs.  Cars that need repairs.  Homes that are endless money pits.  Jobs that become mundane.  Relationships that require constant care.  Children with activities that have us meeting ourselves coming and going.  Families which sometimes translates into the word stress.  That is the short list.

Amid all the activities that pull us, it is essential to find the time to refresh.  While a vacation to a far away place sounds fun, it can also add another level to our stress.  Preparing for a trip is work.  Clothes selected, washed and packed.  Mail stopped.  Animals relocated for our time away.  Money.  Getting the car ready.  Buying the tickets.  Locating a place to stay that is within our budget.  I am exhausted with all the stuff required for a simple get away.

Even with all that is required to finally arrive at our destination, the time there can be just what we need.  We see something different from what we see everyday.  We eat at special places.  We shop in new and interesting stores.  We sleep in.  The best part of this is there is no where we have to be at any certain time.  We are free from schedules.  We can rest, eat, play, think, dream.  We can visit with friends or make memories with our family.  It's just what we needed.  We leave saying how refreshed we are to return and begin again.

Years ago when we lived in the Pacific Northwest, we would drive two or three hours to the mountains in winter to ski.  The absolute beauty of the drive was almost enough for me to feel ready to meet the week.  Huge evergreens with snow covered branches lined the highway.  It was like a trip through fairy land driving to the mountain to slide down all day.  People dressed in colorful outfits were enjoying slipping and sliding down groomed hills. Well, not everyone.  Those who spent much of their day on the snow-covered ground were not especially festive. But me-I remember being so refreshed.  My spirit was literally singing.  Being in such a beautiful place filled me up with joy.  Absolute joy.  When Monday rolled around, I was ready to see those little second graders.  I had done something to change the daily schedule.

Camping, skiing, hiking, walking in the sand beside the incoming waves  of the Pacific Ocean were activities we enjoyed.  Each was a change.  We saw something different, met new people.  The best thing about this is we were only two hours from anything we wanted to do.  It was a good time.

Sameness tends to wear folks down.  When one day looks just like the day before and the day before that,  it is easy to become a little discouraged.  When that happens, it is absolutely necessary we seek out what we need to feel refreshed.  We see the world differently when we are refreshed.  Challenges still arise.  But we are able to see them with fresh eyes.  New solutions appear instead of believing there are none.  We greet others with sincere care.  We feel a bit more peaceful.

There are times when getting away is simply not in the cards.  It's not always about distance.  Maybe we need to spend time with a cherished friend.  Or take a long walk while listening to our kind of music.  Driving to another town to see what is different from what we are used to can also help us feel refreshed.  Being alone with our own thoughts and feelings works, too.  Whatever moves us to that place is what we must seek.

Feeling refreshed is essential for a healthy life.  Whatever it is that takes us to that place, we must make the trip.  Life is about making memories and sharing them.  It is about storing  pictures in our mind that we can pull up when we need a dose of change.  Our lives are full.  However, there is a difference between full and rich.  Busy is a word we throw around.  If we can say we are so busy, then we believe we have arrived.  We are in the middle of it all.  I get that.  Truly I do.  Life makes demands.  We make choices, but somewhere in the middle of busy, hopefully we find time to truly live.  To spend time with family and friends.  To visit over a cup of coffee or a meal.  To connect.
                       
I see a friend coming through the door.  Gotta go.  Feeling refreshed!

We Can Do Better

We Can Do Better-

We can do better.  Easy words to write.  Difficult in so many ways.

On the simplest of levels we can determine to stop nagging our family about dropping clothes where they leave the body.  The living room.  The kitchen.  The hall.  Everywhere but the dirty clothes hamper or basket.  We can make up our mind to give a simple reminder to those who occupy our space.  We can leave a note. We can refuse to pick up anything but what is ours.  Yes, we can decide to do better.

That lasts about a day-or maybe an hour.  All our good intentions fly out the window as we see piles and piles all over the house.  What if company dropped in?  What if we had to leave suddenly and needed a neighbor to watch the house-from the outside only?  What if runs in a loop over and over again in our heads.  Eventually we are worn down.  We do what we vowed not to do.  At first we kick all the piles together.  Then we tell ourselves to behave like a grown-up and pick them up.  We repeat those words.  We can do better we tell ourselves.

Perhaps we believe we have been mistreated.  We fume.  We talk out loud to ourselves about the injustice done to us.  We cry.  We go over the event time and again trying to see where things went south.  Eventually we make a decision.  Part of the challenge came from us.  Maybe we weren't the best friend or partner.  Maybe we did share just an ounce of blame.  After we have examined the situation countless times, we realize it is time to move forward.  We cannot give another minute to the past.  We can't change it.  Our only option is to do better.  Yes, do better.  We make that decision.

These are only two examples where we have the opportunity to do over and better.  We are alive and can do better.  Which brings me to this moment in time in the world.

All of those folks in France last evening had hopes and ambitions.  They had dreams.  They had plans for the next day or next week.  They were enjoying a celebration.  They were the innocents.  As were the innocents who lived their last day in our land during the past months.  Places to be.  People to see.  Children to hug and put to bed with a story and a kiss.  Sweet dreams, they whispered, as they pulled the covers up.

In a blink of an eye, the beat of the heart their ability to do better died.  They did not have the opportunity to right a wrong.  To kiss the wife, husband, child, parent, partner.  They believed they would have another day to do better.  To do that project at work. To open that new store.  To take that award winning photograph.  To visit with that parent in the hospital.  They knew they would have time to accomplish all those things on their radar.  Each of those whose lives were stopped had a life that was waiting for them.

It is difficult to wrap my head and heart around the grief that rests over so many souls.  One minute alive-the next gone.  So sudden and violently.  Never the chance to grab a hand and pull out of harms way.  Never the chance to hold them or love them.  ( I am crying as I write this because my heart cannot hold such grief inside.  It has to come out.)  Break time.

So I ask the question-Can we do better?  Can we ever learn to love?  Why is love so hard?  Why is acceptance of difference impossible in some circles?  What good happens when lives full of potential cease?  How do these vicious acts make our world better?  Can we do better?

Of course we can do better.  But, I have begun to realize that doing better happens in small steps.  It happens when we care about those around us.  When we engage in conversation.  When we hold our beliefs yet attempt to understand anothers.  I think we do better when we reach out to those who need help be that financial or emotional.  Sometimes I want to withdraw into my own little world.  I believe there is safety in that small space.  But, that means I have ceased to live.  I have allowed the world to dictate my life. That I cannot do.  Life is always a chance.

Do I honestly believe we can do better?  Do I believe I can do better?  Loud and clear I shout yes.  I shout that my life will not be lived in fear.  It shall be lived with gusto.  With love and care.  With attention to doing what lifts others.  As long as there is breath in this old body, I shall work at doing better.  There is time to work toward making life better for all.

We can do better.  It won't be easy.  We may need to listen more and talk less.  We may need to sit down with those so very different from us and engage in conversation.  We may need to rethink long held views.  Whatever it takes, we must do better.  Our children deserve a world where they are safe and free to become all they desire to be.

Life is so precious.  We must do better.  It is not an option.

Ramblings

Ramblings--

My mind is dry.  No matter how I try to connect words into sentences, most words remain disconnected, wandering around in my mind trying to find a resting place.  I do that frown that pulls the eye brows down and makes wrinkles appear much sooner than they should.  Think, I tell myself.  Think and extract those thoughts that are tumbling around in the brain.  It is all to no avail.  Thoughts I desire to share will not appear.

Some say this is writer's block.  Could be.  However, I believe it goes much deeper than writer's block.  It goes to the heart and soul of all that has and is happening in the world today.  Sometimes words aren't enough.  That seems to be where I am at this point in time.  So much to share yet unable to share.  I feel the need to speak, to raise my voice and scream why.  Why?  What is accomplished when acts of violence shatter lives?  How is humanity made better when those who have grudges or disagreements with others turn to violence in order to even the score?  Remember when people could talk through their differences?  Maybe retain their beliefs but gain a little understanding of others?  I don't understand.  I simply don't understand.

For sure we have all been upset with another person.  We have refused to speak or spend time. We have chosen to keep our distance.  All of these behaviors and more speak to the art of care. Yes, care.  We have given ourselves time to work through our own prejudices.  In taking time and not attacking, we are showing a great deal of care.  We don't have to agree with everyone.  What we do have to do is refuse to be drawn into the world of hate that explodes into our living/family rooms from endless news casts.  We can turn the channel.  We can read a book or visit with a friend. We can take a meal to someone who is sad.  We can meet with others whose beliefs are so different from ours in an effort to gain understanding.  We can be a bit more open to life.

Actions like these require time.  Time to sit down and listen.  Time to refrain from blame in a conversation. Time to think.  This presents major challenges to our present world.  We want it all now.  Right this moment.   That old term we used to use for children-instant gratification.  Here's the thing about that.  Had we taken a moment to think, we might have made a different, dare I say better, choice.  Time is the one thing we seem to lack.

We fill our lives with activities.  We race from one to the other.  If we can say we are so busy when someone asks about our lives, we believe we have arrived.  Busy is the "in" word. And it is certainly true.  We are busy people.  We have children involved in activities that keep us racing from one event to another.  We have jobs and home and friends and family.  All good things that fill life with memories.  Yet, is it remotely possible that we have lost something amid all the noise of our lives? We simply cannot find the time to sit and listen.  To truly try to understand another point of view or life style that might be different from ours. There it is again.  That aggrevating word-time.  It pulls us up short.  Would someone's life have been better had we had time?  Would our own lives be enriched had we taken time to simply be?  Frustrated with myself over time I have wasted.

It is past time for frustration.  It is time for action.  What action, you ask.  That is your decision.  And mine.  If I know someone needs a listening ear yet refuse to be there, I have missed a chance for a blessing.  I have missed the opportunity to practice my faith in a world that truly needs love and care. Do you believe that a simple smile can change a day?  A moment?  I do.  There have been times when all I desired was human contact.  And when a stranger smiled or opened a door for me, my spirit relaxed a bit.  Caring for others is often just that simple.

A few days ago a friend sent a text telling me of a tragedy that resulted in a death.  She wanted to know if she should go to the house and see the family since she is not a "best friend."  I told her to go.  Grief doesn't care if you are best friends.  People filled with grief need others.  She asked what she might take.  I suggested drinks.  Water, soda, etc.  She put drinks in a cooler with ice and went over.  She later thanked me for 'nudging' her to make that trip immediately.  We think too much before we reach out.  Maybe because we are trying to be careful about another's privacy.  Trying to allow them time when what they desire is a caring spirit.  Caring for others is so personal.  Each of us have so many opportunities.  Think of them as golden moments that allow us to touch another life.  And in return, ours is touched, too.

I fear this is a bit of a ramble.  Going from one thing to another.  It is the best I can do at this point in time.  The fact that any words found their way to this page astounds me.  My soul hurts for all those who died or were injured in Florida.  My heart is broken for the family of the little boy at the water's edge.  My spirit weeps for injustice wherever it appears.  That is the most I can write about those tragic events.  It is too painful to see other's hurts.

What to take away from this?  Not sure.  I will leave that up to each of you.  May we all wallow in our own thoughts and beliefs.  May we question.  May we hold a banner if holding a banner seems right.  May we be available.  May we listen well.  May we withhold blame and reach for understanding.

I am tired of thinking.  Blessings to each of you.

Thoughts on Shop Ownership

Thoughts on Shop Ownership--

What are the good things about having a shop?  There are many.

Meeting new people and making new friends tops the list of shop ownership.  Every time the door opens is another opportunity to enjoy a few minutes visiting and assisting someone in their quest to make their home the best it can be.  We visit about style.  We talk about color.  During these discussions I receive information that will help me when I shop.  Maybe they make a purchase.  Maybe they don't.  My hope is they will add  my shop to their list of favorites and return with friends.

Another perk of shop ownership is seeing friends again.  Life moves all of us.  We move away. We lose contact with people we have known for years.  The shop is a reason to reconnect.  To visit again. To learn what is happening in the lives of people who shared our space once upon a time.  It is a time to laugh together or share a tear because of loss.  What joy when those from our past walk through the door.  We smile and hug and talk.  A precious time.

Of course, my hope is that items in the shop find a new home.  I carefully select each item.  Only those things that I would allow in my home come to live in the shop.  Perhaps this is not the most professional way to run a small business.  But, it is the way mine is run.  I won't sell something that I know is wrong for a friend's home.  Purchases keep the bills paid.  That is a fact.  However, this shop isn't just about the money. It is about helping others make their nests perfect.  If someone finds an item they have been searching for, my goals for the shop are realized.

I view the shop as an extension of my life.  Another journey taken.  A dream realized.  Will it succeed?  I believe it has already succeeded.  It started as a thought, an idea.  It moved to a plan.  That plan became a reality.  And now I have the wonderful opportunity to open the doors twice a week and invite the outside world in.  Some have asked why I decided to do this at this particular stage in my life.  My answer is why not.  Why not learn something new.  Why not take a chance.  Why not move away from what is known to the unknown.  Why not embrace life in a different way.  Why not stretch my mind.  It isn't about years of life.  It is life being lived in a new way.  It is being willing to risk knowing that all of life is risk.

Certainly there are challenges.  But, I have found that people are willling and eager to help when they know their skill and talent is needed.  Friends and strangers who have become friends have offered their assistance to help me get this shop off the ground.  They have spent hours of their own time doing what I cannot do.  And because of them my dream is realized.  People are good.  Yes, they are.

My suggestion for each of you is this.  If something knocks on your heart's door, listen.  Maybe open the door a bit to examine what is on the other side.  Close the door if the time is not right, but don't lock it.  Leave it open a crack.  You never know when the time will be perfect for your dream to take form and live.  It may begin as a hobby.  It may begin as a plan written in a notebook or journal.  Whatever form it takes, welcome the creative process.  Who knows.  One day you may find yourself opening yourself to a new venture.

Just like me.

Shopping, Shopping, Shopping

Shopping, Shopping, Shopping


  Daffodil Lane has kept me running.  Something leaves the shop.  Something comes in. Shopping, shopping, shopping.  Near and far.  In state and out. Searching for the right items is challenging.  Who would want this?  What group would this appeal to?  Questions.  Questions. Questions.  Take one thing.  Leave another.  Did I make the right decision?  Miles on the truck.  Miles on me.

Am I complaining?  Not one bit.  You see, when you set your mind to achieve a dream, all the work is part of the process.   The cost is counted before the action begins.  Actually, it is a huge learning curve.  Forms must be filed, numbers granted by the state.  Space located.  Weeks pass as more work is done.  Painting, cleaning.  Bringing in the items for sale comes close to last.

Opening day arrives.  With no idea if anyone will grace the doors, it opens.  There is a sense of accomplishment.  The dream-reality.  People give warnings.  They say things like they hope it works. They hope it isn't a failure.  Most offer positive encouragement.  Interesting the take on other's dreams.

Here is what I think about the failure comment.  Failure occurs when a dream remains a dream.  There is absolutely no opportunity to fail when nothing is attempted.  To be fair, not all people are wired to take risks.  The absolute fear that would accompany risk keeps some rooted in their present spot.  I get that.  Personally, I applaud those who take risks, and those who don't.  It's not a good/bad thing.

Failure?  Never gave that a thought.  When I look around at my little shop, I celebrate all the hours and hours of planning.  Time spent engaged with other people who also had a dream and worked to see it become their reality. All the conversations with other women who never stop moving forward brings me joy.  They reach out for that next adventure.  They embrace all that a new thing brings.  And when that part of life is passed, they move on.  You see, nothing is forever.

  Already I have met wonderful people.  People who came to shop and stayed to talk.  To visit about life and things that have real meaning.  To say that success is measured by the amount of money banked at the end of a work day misses the point.  Certainly it is necessary to pay all the bills.  And have money left over to do that endless shopping.  However, the real value in this for me is the ability to help others make their homes and lives better.  To make their homes a place of refuge from life.  It is also about valuing each person who walks through the doors of Daffodil Lane.  To see each one as a new friend.  To learn.  To listen.

Even when no one is shopping, I feel a sense of pride in the knowledge that my husband and I created something new from nothing.  We are a team. We work together.  We took an idea and ran with it.  I am so proud of us for not giving up when we had hurdles to cross.  We kept moving forward toward the dream.  And now it is here.

I am writing this in my little shop.  It is quiet.  I am surrounded by pretty things.  It makes my heart smile to know that maybe someone will come in and find that one or two things that will make their heart smile, too.

Was it worth it?  Absolutely.  You bet.  As with all things in life, it will have its day.  And while it has that day, I will enjoy every minute.

The Black Lid

The Black Lid-

For the past four weeks we have been quite busy putting a store together.  In case anyone says there is nothing to doing that, let me be the first to smack them up beside the head. It is work.  From beginning to end.  But, it is enjoyable work.

Four walls, some openings for doors, a ceiling and a floor presented themselves.  How could I pull this together into a store?  Bit by bit it took shape.  The flower unfolded and blossomed right in front of me.  However, all of that time spent in that place meant things at home did not get done.  Laundry remained unfolded, a washer full of washed clothes  lost that newly washed scent.  One more go-around for that load. And the floors-it was time to get the old broom out and round up all those dust bunnies.

So, with broom in hand I headed for the farthest room pushing all the bunnies toward the common area where the dust pan awaited.  The job was nearly completed when I decided to open the door to the pantry and give it a quick swipe with the broom.  All was well until I spotted what appeared to me to be a lid.  It was rectangular in shape.  Black in color.  Must have missed the garbage can, I thought.  Nothing to do but shove the broom into the deepest part of the pantry floor and retrieve the lid.

I knew trouble was afoot when the broom seemed stuck to the lid.  Probably something sticky in the container it belonged to.  Pulling the broom out of the pantry, I put my big toe on the black lid.  My big toes are quite large.  My brother-in-law called them obscene.  That might be a slight exaggeration.  Nevertheless, they are substantial in size.

It seemed strange to me when my big toe stuck on the lid.  Now the straws on the broom and my big toe were stuck.  I shook them, pulled at them.  They were firmly held on the lid.  You have probably figured this out by now.  My husband had placed one of those sticky pads in the far back of the pantry to catch any critter that might wander into that space.  Like a mouse.  A mouse was not stuck on that pad.  The broom and I were.

It took quite a bit of effort to get my toe off that pad.  When my toe came off, yucky, sticky stuff came off with it.  One of our family was doubled over in laughter.  One wasn't.  The laughing one had to do the pulling to free me from my trap.  Then the real trouble began.That sticky stuff came off the pad with my toe.  The entire bottom of my toe and my fingers that tried to free the toe were sticking to everything.  My fingers were sticking together.  My toe was sticking to the floor.  What to do?

Warm water and soap did not help one bit.  Finger nail polish remover was useless.  So I tried rubbing the sticky off.  Nope.  Wouldn't budge.  I scrubbed my hands under hot water and eventually they began to return to normal. Not so with the toe.  Could not put socks on.  They caught on the sticky and stayed.  Finally, the one who laughed suggested a bandaid. Maybe I could put a bandaid over the worse part of it and go about my business.  It seemed only fair that he be the one to locate one for me.  During this process I do believe socks were thrown at the offender.

After wrapping the bandaid around my big toe, I was able to pull on a tennis shoe.  However, my toe stuck to the bottom of the shoe.  At least I had a shoe on.  I could go about my business.  And the one who laughed could use that broom and dust pan to collect all the dirt that lay in a pile next to the pantry door.

Ok.  I have to admit that during the process I laughed.  A lot.  As I write this, I am chuckling.  It was one funny moment.  Me with my foot in the air with a black lid hanging from it.  And a broom that was held as firmly as I was.

What lesson was learned?  Let someone else do the sweeping!

Update on Daffodil Lane

Update on Daffodil Lane--

Three weeks ago we began a new journey.  Were we out of our mind?  Sometimes we think so.

The past three weeks have included painting, cleaning, lifting, arranging, rearranging, arranging again.  We have spent countless hours poking around and through items looking for the right one.  We have loaded our truck and car with treasures.  Well, maybe not treasures exactly.  But certainly interesting pieces.  We have driven hours and hours to find the perfect piece.  We have met new people who have offered their advice and assistance.  We have called on friends to help with lifting and carrying.

Sleepless nights are the norm.  My brain does not stop when the clock says it is time to sleep.  Ideas flood my mind pushing any thought of sleep into tomorrow.  An "aha" moment becomes ten or twelve as the clock makes its way to 3 AM.  Who needs all that sleep anyway.

So, how is the new shop looking, you ask.  Well, I am happy to say that it is coming together.  Only a few days ago I sat in the room full of stuff and wondered how I could make any sense out of it.  Then I remembered to see one tree and not the entire forest.  One step at a time.  Slowly but surely sense from chaos emerged.  Or rather is emerging.  Seeing one section come alive is exciting.  Each new thing added brings that look I am working for.

And then it hit me.  If someone actually purchases something from the shop, it will have to be replaced.  At that moment I thought about keeping it all for me!  So much easier.  Then I remembered how much I love seeing other people make their nest perfect.  My hope is that merchandise in my shop will be just what someone needs to make their room feel right.  That makes my heart smile because our home is our refuge from all the noise of the world.

So, we keep adding.  Lifting, arranging, moving.  Creating spaces.  Hoping that when people enter the door of Daffodil Lane, they feel joy.  They smile.  And enjoy a few moments created just for them.

The opening is 10 AM, Saturday, May 7.  Come say hi!

Walking the Labyrinth

Walking the Labyrinth--

We turned off the main road and began the ten mile drive up the mountainside.  Eventually we left the paved road and continued our journey on gravel.   Tall evergreen trees lined both sides of the roadway.  Fog encircled the mountain top.  It had not yet been burned away by the heat of the sun.  Blue sky showed through small patches of fog announcing that soon it would overtake the whole expanse of the heavens.  The day was crisp and sweet.  Our destination was a lovely retreat center.

Many years ago we discovered this special place while exploring new countryside.  Those who dreamed it and then built it desired that it be a place for people to meditate.  To reconnect with themselves.  To perhaps engage in conversation about life and its meaning.  Classes are offered during the summer.  It is a place for thinking.  For touching that quiet place within us that often becomes lost in the busy of life.  Paths meander through the tall evergreens gently whispering to us that nature welcomes us into her arms.  Ferns flourish on the forest floor.  Wild flowers decorate the woods.  It is a place like no other.

On this particular trip up the mountainside we came upon a welcoming center.  Inside were two people who greeted me with genuine kindness.  Since our last visit years ago when one could drive into the center, changes had taken place.  Now reservations were required to enter.  Did I have a reservation?  No, I didn't.

During our conversation I mentioned that we were visiting from Illinois.  Our trip was almost at its end.  And then I mentioned the real reason I wished permission to enter.

Several years ago I had the opportunity to walk a labyrinth.  A labyrinth is a circular path that has a beginning point.  One enters at this point and continues along a path toward the center.  The path through the labyrinth is often outlined with stones set into the ground providing direction to the walker.  It winds inward toward the center.  After reaching the center one retraces the steps until the beginning point is again reached.  It is an ancient tool for meditation.   Walking a labyrinth is a spiritual experience.

This center built a labyrinth in a clearing beside a beautiful stream.   It was set with stones.  It was quite large with a winding path.  I knew this because I saw pictures in a magazine of this particular one.

I was disappointed that I would not be allowed to enter the grounds and make my way to the labyrinth, but I understood that rules were rules.  So, I thanked them for their kindness and turned to leave.  The woman who was answering my questions stopped me.  She said she was going to do something she seldom did.  She was going to give me an hour to visit the labyrinth.  One hour.  I asked if my husband could join me.  She took both our names and directed me to the path that led to the river.

We hurried down the path and across the grounds searching for this most special spot.  Eventually we located it.  So simple.  Rocks formed a path placed by someone who understood the significance of this activity.  Someone who brought hundreds of stones and carefully laid them out in a specific pattern forming an exact circle.  I entered.

Sometimes people carry a stone while they walk.  Others might repeat a mantra.  Still others walk with folded hands.  That is what I did.  I folded my hands and began my journey.  And it is truly a journey.  With each step my mind journeyed inward.  What was left for me to learn?  What could I do that would move myself and others to a more peaceful place?  Even the question of who God is entered my mind.  Eventually I quieted all the voices in my head-well, almost all of them.  And I simply was.  I felt such peace.  All the beauty of the earth was right there within my sight.  It was overwhelming.  Tears made their way down my cheeks.  Tears that expressed my deep love of nature.     And my awareness of the spirit indwelling.

The hour passed quickly.  Leaving was difficult.  Connecting with our spirit is a precious time.  I knew once I left, I would return to life.  But, I also knew that part of me would be changed forever.  I would have the memory to take with me.  We hurried back to the welcoming center.

I walked inside to thank her for allowing me this time.  I told her what it meant to me through those same tears.  She replied that she never does that for people without reservations, but that she felt a connection with me and knew it was the right thing to do.  

The fog had lifted during the time we were at the center.  The sky was beautiful.  All blue and bright. The tall evergreens stood guard over the road, and the river continued its rush to its destination. All as it should be on this most beautiful day.

Treasures of the Ocean

Treasures of the Ocean--

One of our favorite things to do is walk the Oregon coast searching for agates.  We read the tide charts because the best time to go is when the tide is out.  All the rocks and treasures that the ocean gives up are found when it is low tide.  We have spent the past five weeks in high rubber boots and jackets doing that.  It is easy to spot people who hunt for agates.  They walk slowly along the edge of the ocean or perhaps wade a little into it.  Their heads are down.  In their pocket is a zip lock plastic bag or a bag from a grocery store to hold found objects.  Agates are usually found where rocks abound.  They come in all sizes and several colors.  Agates are little rocky nuggets of silica that formed inside ancient rocks or shells millions of years ago and as the outer layer wears away, the agate remains.  They come in varied colors ranging from orange to red or pink to lavender-even black.

Another treasure the Northwest ocean gives up is sea glass.  Sea glass is glass from bottles that have found their way in the ocean.  After being tumbled and tossed by the waves, the edges of the glass are rounded and smooth.  Often the glass has a cloudy appearance.  The usual colors are blue, green, white and clear.  People who hunt for sea glass use it for jewelry and art objects.  If the edges are not rounded, it is considered new to the ocean and not desirable.

People who collect agates often place them in tumblers.  After three weeks of tumbling, the rocks are smooth and shiny.  They are also used in jewelry or placed in bowls as found objects from the sea.

 We are leaving soon so we decided to spend today searching.  The best times to search are low tide after a storm.  The ocean deposits treasures everywhere after high waves.  As there was no storm,  pickings were a little slim.

I was walking along the edge of the ocean with my head down when someone spoke to me.  A young man walked beside me and told me I had missed two agates.  He opened his hand and there they were.  Before I could say anything, he handed them to me.  People don't usually share agates.  Yet, here he was offering me two beautiful ones.  After I thanked him, he put his hand into his pocket and pulled out two large agates that had been tumbled.  As he held them out for me to see,  he told me to select one to keep.  I was shocked.  He was offering me something wonderfully beautiful.  He held them up to the sun so I could see the designs inside the stones.  I asked him which one he would like for me to have.  He selected the most beautiful of the two and placed it in my hand.  At that point I told him I was visiting from Illinois.  He told me to tell my friends that I found it.  He said he finds them all the time.  It was such a lovely moment in time.

A little later we were making our way toward our car.  I was walking slower with my head down still searching for a few more for our collection.  Looking up, I saw a man approaching.  As he came closer, he asked me if I was having any luck finding agates.  I told him not much.  He stopped, opened his hand and showed me four he had found.  Then he handed them to me.  Surprised, I mumbled a thank you and told him we live in Illinois.  His response was awesome.  He said, "God bless you in Illinois."  And he continued his walk along the edge of the water.

These are only two of the experiences I have had with gracious people.  People who were searching just like I was and were willing to give up treasures to a stranger.   When one woman learned where I live, she placed a beautiful agate in my hand and gently closed my fingers over it.  She said she lives here and can look anytime.  That she wanted me to have what she found.

A moment in time.  A treasure far greater than a found agate.  One person touching another with grace and kindness.  Never to meet again yet leaving a lasting impression.

That's what it's about, isn't it?  Touching others with gentle spirits.  With a giving attitude.   Giving up something you desire so that another can experience the same joy.  Spending a moment connecting with a fellow walker on the planet.  Makes me wonder how many times I could have shared yet didn't.  The good thing is this.  There is another day waiting for me to give of myself to others.  Strangers, family, friends.  And I shall.

A New Venture

A New Venture--

Life presents new challenges almost on a daily basis.  Recently I accepted a new challenge.  You are the first to know.

Soon I will be opening a little shop.  Its name is Daffodil Lane.  The shop will be all about the home. New and refurbished furniture, lamps, rugs, original paintings and many other items will be available for browsing and purchase.  In addition, I will be happy to assist anyone who wants a few suggestions about room arrangement and such.

The plan is to open by May 1.  But, much has to happen before that can become a reality.  Soon there will be a Facebook page to like.  Please do so.

Lexington is the home of my new shop.  

It is never too late to start something new that brings joy and fun into our lives and the lives of others!!

Hope to see you at Daffodil Lane.

There Is Time

There Is Time--


Life is filled with thoughtful moments.  Moments when we stop for a bit and reflect.  Moments that take us to another place and time in our lives.  Thoughtful moments that slow us down.  We think differently if only for a moment.

One of those thoughtful moments crashed in on me recently.  You know how this happens because it has probably happened to you, too.  These moments can be brought on by something we see, something someone says.  Or we might find ourselves witnessing an event through new eyes.  However they happen, they do happen.

It was a busy day.  Traffic was crazy.  People were hurrying in all directions with destinations heavy on their minds.  It seemed to me that everyone but me had somewhere specific to be at a designated time.  No leisurely driving around for fun.  Driving with a purpose.  And then I saw it.

Just ahead and on my left was a funeral home.  That funeral home has been there for years and years. In fact, I don't remember a time when the building was anything but a funeral home.  On this particular day the parking lot was empty.  I remember being thankful for that.  A brief moment in a day.  A quick look while driving past.

Usually when something comes into my sight line or my mind, it remains for a short period of time.  I acknowledge it and move on.  But this day was different.  New thoughts flooded my mind.  And for some reason, I could not allow them to quickly pass through.  I was stuck with them.  It was as if they arrived to help me understand a new truth or an old truth that was neatly tucked away.  Whatever the reason, these thoughts brought me to a new and better place in life.

My first thought was one day I would be there.  Maybe not in that particular location but definitely inside a facility quite like this one.  I would not be attending to show respect or celebrate the life of someone I knew and cared about.  It would be me.  My name on the remembrance envelopes.  My family saying goodbye.  My friends laughing about times shared.

While that may seem morbid to some, it served as a wake-up call to me.  Thoughts crashed into my mind.  The lessons I saw from this were all about the time left.  What would I make of it?  How would I spend it?  How would my being alive on this planet help others?  What habits were destructive and in need of change?  Was an attitude adjustment necessary?  Am I living a life from a place of love or a place of complacency?

Eventually I arrived at a traffic light.  Everyone moved together in the direction of their destination.  So did I.  It was time to move forward with the day.  My mind centered on finding a parking space.  Getting to the coffee shop in time to locate an empty table and two chairs for my friend and me.  We meet often to discuss the important events of life.  OK.. Maybe not the world's important challenges.  Mostly the challenges and joys of our lives.

I locked the earlier thoughts of the day in a safe place to be revisited another time.  So, here we are discussing them.  It has been a few months since that morning.  I will share with you that I have thought about them often.  Somewhere deep inside I feel they might be guiding me to a more peaceful place.  Sanding off the edges.  Removing pieces that must be thrown away.  Taking me to a higher level.  Causing me to stop and think before passing judgement or being critical.  A lesson in love.

Isn't it wonderful how we can be caught off guard by the simplest things?  How a flowering tree or shrub or the first daffodil of spring can cause us to catch our breath?  It is all about the little things.  The things that bring us the greatest joy are those things that do not come wrapped in lovely packages with big bows.  They are those words we spoke that made others laugh.  The holidays we celebrated with a meal and rememberances.  The walks when we shared our deepest hurts and disappointments.  Those and many others are the simple things in life that make us who we are.

Here is one thing I know.  Between this moment and that day there is time.

Another Year

Another Year--

Seeing excitement on the faces of children and teens is all most of us need to say it was a good time-a great time.  Watching faces as gifts are unwrapped is one of the joys of life.  What is inside?  How did the giver know that this was what we wanted most?  The wonder of it all.

A year has passed since we last opened gifts together.  An entire year.  All those days, weeks and months of living.  Watching one season melt into another.  Laughing with one another over some goofy thing that was said or done.  A memory made.  Crying about a hurt or disappointment.  Vowing to learn lessons so that we don't repeat past errors.  Accepting that good and bad are the stuff of life.  It is how we deal with it all that makes us who we are.

Walking through gardens on an early spring day in anticipation of the beauty that will suddenly appear. Summer with flowers and plants full grown make us smile and remember what they looked like the year before. Not quite as large or full.  Fall arrives.  Colors fill the air.  The sun comes at us from a new angle  Blue skies seem bluer.  Everything begins the transition.  Rest.  Wait.  Refresh.  Winter brings its own beauty.  Bare tree trunks against a gray sky.  Cold winds bring shivers.  Scarves decorate necks.  And the cycle continues.

During those seasons some have experienced loss.  The kind of loss that tears at the heart and soul.  A place at the table and in the heart that will not be filled.  Memories everywhere.  Yet, just as the seasons of the earth, humans have seasons.  We are born, we grow and learn, we reach adulthood, we work, we retire, we return to that from which we came.  It is the process that we all will experience.  Some sooner than others.  Memories.

Joy arrives with babies, weddings, new jobs, new friends, something wished for gained.  Joy washes over us like beautiful snow flakes falling on a winter's night.  We see it.  We feel it.  We taste it.  It takes our breath away.  We are encouraged.  Joy has come.  We will never be quite the same.  Joy is that part of us that starts at our toes and leaps from our eyes as we enter its presence.  That thing we long for every day of our lives.

Lessons learned fill the seasons.  Learning when to move forward or when to turn away helps us enjoy a more satisfying life.  We all have choice.  There are those times when flowers planted do not grow.  Do not bloom.  Plants may be planted in the wrong spot.  Too much sun.  Too much shade.  Not enough water.  When we observe a plant or flower struggling to stay alive, we have a choice.  Either we allow it to struggle or we move it to a better location.  The same is true of life.  We may find ourselves in situations that are challenging.  What to do?  Where to go for help?  If we are to bloom and grow to our fullest, it maybe necessary to make some changes.  Easy?  No.  But then, many things in life are not easy.

Memories fill our hearts.  Remember?  Remember when we stayed up late and drank a couple of bottles of wine together?  Remember when we sat around a table and enjoyed a meal and good conversation?  Or played cards and knew the person next to us was cheating?  And we didn't care?  Remember when we took a short trip on the spur of the moment and had a marvelous time?  Remember when we looked at old photographs of our families and felt their closeness?  Remember...These are also the seasons of our lives.  We will talk about them always.  Remember the day we took that trip to Chicago on the busiest shopping day of the year?  Remember when we were stranded at an airport?  Remember when our sweet dog left us?  Hopefully, memories are mostly happy.  Happy times shared.

Now we have made the cycle once again.  We are grateful that we are still around.  Grateful that we can enjoy one more Christmas season.  One more opportunity to love on one another. To make sweet memories that will hold us through the cold winter days and nights.

Soon gifts will be opened.  Eyes will light up with joy.  Thanks will echo in rooms.  Laughter will fill the air.  Another year.  Another chance to get it right.  Another opportunity to tell someone you love them.  To fill life with love and joy. To say I am sorry and make things better. To forgive.  To seek love and peace.   Don't let it pass you by.

Merry Christmas.

Expectations

Expectations--

What are my expectations?  Should I even have any?  Are expectations good?  Are they bad?  Are they neutral?  What if my expectations miss a mark?  Is it possible to go beyond expectations?

Absolutely I have expectations about certain things.  I expect my car to start when I get in it.  I expect my house to be standing when I return from a trip.  I expect my retirement check to arrive in the mail so I can pay those bills that demand payment.  These are only a few of the things I hope and expect to be in place in my life.  If any of these expectations cease, my life will be a little more challenged.  So, yes, there are some expectations that I do have.

There are many things I do not expect.  When I purchase a lottery ticket, I really do not expect my numbers to be the winning ones.  But, boy I can dream!  Owning a second or third home is another expectation I do not have.  Add to that the latest sports car or the biggest diamond.  There is no expectation that I will be the next governor or president.  Being a gourmet cook is another skill that is lacking from my abilities.  This list is very long.

Would I say that having expectations is good or bad?  Some of both.  The thing about expectations is this.  If we set the mark so high that no one can ever reach it, then we are the ones who suffer.  When we have a view of how things should be and are dissappointed when those expectations are not met, we feel let down.  It's almost as if we have a hidden set of rules that we don't share with others.  We keep them deep inside.  Actually, we are playing with a stacked deck.  Since others are not in on our set of expectations, they have no opportunity to even have a discussion with us.  They are in the dark.  In that case, expectations become negative.

They are good when we set our hearts toward our personal goals.  When we want to go to a certain location and set goals toward reaching that expectation, that is a good thing.  Or when we work hard at achieving something personal.  Maybe winning a race or getting that hit to drive the runner on third home for the big win.  Personal goals do not negatively impact others.  They are set for ourselves.  Certainly we can set them too high, but they are always adjustable.  These types of expectations drive us forward to being better for ourselves and others.

What about Christmas?  Are there expectations that are positive?  Negative?  The positive ones include time with family and friends.  Time to celebrate whatever religious tradition we observe.  Time to give a gift to someone we love.  Time to listen to beautiful music prepared especially for this season.  Time to hug people and say Merry Christmas.  Time to embrace the season and let it move us to a place of love and peace.

Negative?  Yes, that is possible.  When we expect certain things or actions, and they do not show up, our feelings are hurt.  We might feel that others don't love us.  Or we see what others have and become aware once again that we don't have those things.   Christmas can be a dreaded season when life has dealt us challenges.  When we feel alone or lonely.  And we all know it is possible to be lonely in a crowd of people.  Or when we want to give a gift but lack the funds to do so.  Especially during this season it is easy to slip into despair.  Why can't our lives be like all the others we are observing?

This is what I think.  Let go of expectations.  Learn to love others for who they are.  Not for what we think they want.  Enjoy diverse personalities.  Welcome unique ways of doing things.  Laugh more.  Smile more.  Be delighted when those unexpected things occur.  They are truly gifts.  Give people a little space.  Allow them to live their life without judgment.  Simply welcome all.  We don't have to be alike to have fun together.  We don't have to believe the exact same things to share moments.  The less we expect the happier we will be.  You see, when we set expectations of others, we are making it all about us.  We need to think about that a bit.  Mull it over in our minds.

Life is short.  Let's concentrate on the joy others bring into our lives.  Let's celebrate the fact that we have the opportunity to share moments on this planet.  Let's find the absolute good.

Back off expectations.  Move toward love.

I Looked

I Looked--

 I looked at all the beauty in this world.  I saw the kindness of people, the beauty of friendship,  the wonder of this planet and all she gives,  the love of family, the examples of grace in so many lives.

What I saw filled my spirit with thankfulness.  May I always see others through eyes of grace and care. Always and forever.

The Beauty in Life

The Beauty in Life--

With so much ugly happening in our world, let us turn our attention to the pretty.  Let us give ourselves over to what is good and right and kind.  Let us care for one another even when life is on a good course. People need affirmation that what they are accomplishing is worthy.  That they are walking in a good way.

Celebration must be present in life everyday.  Celebrate that we have one more day to practice care for others.  Celebrate that we have choice.  Celebrate that we can come together to talk about our differences.  Celebrate that we can make decisions about our actions and beliefs.

It is my observation that a smile given is a smile returned.  Is that a little thing?  An insignificant action? I don't think so.  Many of us are walking around in skin that is worried.  Or upset.  Or fearful.  When a stranger offers that smile, we feel part of us relaxing.  We return that lovely greeting and walk away feeling better.  I realize we cannot know another's battles.  But, we can offer what we can to a world that needs care.  Making eye contact and smiling as we meet fellow shoppers during this busy season,  is a way of offering ourselves.  Of moving away from being centered on ourselves.  It truly does matter that we do this small, simple thing.

While decorated trees, twinkling lights and gifts occupy a large part of this season,  giving to others in need soars.  People reach into wallets or their own personal time and offer assistance.  They want others to have one day of joy.  One day with full tummys.  One day when people they do not know offer words of hope and encouragement.  The truth of these acts is the givers receive as much or more than than those they help.  It is my belief that we do not wish to be uncaring.  To refuse to see need.  I think we are all so busy with making a living that we forget to make a life.  We forget to schedule time to think about the real meaning of life.  It is so easy to fall into this habit.  Days follow days.  Weeks pass. We mean to do this thing for someone in need, but we are just so busy.  This is a true statement.  How to change from thoughts to actions?  Something to ponder.

Recently someone in the car ahead of mine in the drive-thru at Starbucks purchased my drink.  That is no small thing.  Coffee costs more than a gallon of gas.  It made my heart smile, and it made me think about ways I could pay it forward.  The person in the car in front of mine probably did not know me.  He/she simply offered a bit of sunshine to me.  A lovely gesture to a stranger.

And then there is this young man who works at Starbucks.  Over time we have become friends.  We wave to one another when I go through to pick up my drink.  We did not share names.  Just spent a little time visiting when the line was slow.  His kindness touched my heart.  I decided to take a small gift to him as a way of saying I appreciate his friendly spirit.  We finally exchanged names.  We have made plans to meet for coffee--surprise--and chat.  He is on the front end of his journey. I am on the end of mine yet our spirits touched one another.  What joy.  I am always pleasantly surprised with the new people who make their way through my life.  They bring new ideas and new thoughts.  A discussion over a cup of coffee with a new friend.  What does it take?  Time.  That precious commodity we all wish we had more of.

We can give hope to those who are struggling.  Those who feel hopeless.  We can encourage their efforts toward a better life.  We can listen as they share their story.  We can withhold judgement.  After all, it takes great courage to share from our deepest places.  We can send encouraging notes, emails, texts to those who need a little lift.  None of these things require one penny.  We do not have to rush out to buy a gift.  The gift we give is the gift of ourselves.  Our time.  There it is again.  That word.  Time.  Maybe we should take a little bit of it and rearrange a moment to make way for blessings by being in relationship with others.

Let us not forget the gift of love.  That feeling that motivates our every action.  That moves us to do extraordinary things.  Love is the compass of our lives pointing us always toward doing good in this world.  Yes, we live in troubling times.  Yes, violence seeks to take away our peace.  But let us never forget that love is the greatest thing of all.

There will always be ugly in this world.  It has always been that way.  I believe we have the ability to bring love into a hurting world.  We only have to look around to see all the good that people are doing. Let us celebrate everyday we have.  And remember that our celebration of life encourages others.

When Did It Happen?

When Did It Happen?--

When did it happen?  Is it possible to pinpoint the exact moment in time?  Perhaps it was gradual.  That would explain part of it.  A slow movement away from knowledge.  From involvement.  Not intentional.   A passage of life?  Moving from one piece of our puzzle to another along our journey.

Each stop along our journey teaches us more about ourselves, and the world we inhabit.  Are we aware of others as we journey?  Is our time and energy wrapped up in our own place and time?  Is it a mixture of the two?  How do we define a well lived life?

These questions haunt me.  Fear that I have moved far away from what is important and meaningful to me fills my thoughts.  It is easy to be involved when you know about need.  When you see it daily.  At what point did I cease to know about need?   Involvement in a career certainly made a huge difference. Constant contact with people brings the opportunity to do for others.  Those days were so lovely.

Moving into the stage of life where working is no longer necessary brings with it much goodness.  Time to do the new thing.  Time to develop interests that were once only dreams.  Time to have time.  Yet there can be a downside to this stage of the journey.  Isolation, removal from being actively involved in life creates a void.  The sense of being a useful person in society is diminished.

When did I move from being aware to being unaware?  To being involved in helping to taking care of self?  When did my world become smaller?  I do not like to admit this about myself.  It would be much easier to erect a facade to shield myself from the world.  This time in life is all about taking care of self, isn't it?  After all, I did much during my working years.  Yet, that small voice deep inside is beginning to yell.  To attempt to get my attention.  To assure me that there is good to be done, and I can do it.  To get back into the hurry and bustle of life. It is urging me to open myself to new challenges.  To step outside this zone of comfort I have erected around my life.

Why is this important to write about?  Maybe putting words on this page means I have reached the point of action.  Maybe thinking these thoughts out loud for you to read means I am acknowledging my deep need to enter life in a new way.  To step out and take a new chance.  To know that I do not do this alone.  This drive within comes from a divine place.  And when that divine place pushes, it is time to move.  Even if the direction is unclear.

I welcome your thoughts.  I welcome the insight you have.  I welcome your presence in my life.  For we are part of one another.   Part of a plan much greater than we can ever imagine.  If you are struggling with your place on the journey, I welcome your words.   It is in sharing ourselves honestly and fully that we grow.  That we do what we were put here to do.

When did it happen?  Slowly.  Quietly.  Innocently.  Recognizing is the first step.  Praying and thinking is the second.  Asking is third.  Listening is next.  And action is the last step in reentry.

Where shall this lead?  I know not.  What I do know is this.  My greatest happiness comes in helping others find their way.  In giving back to this world.  In seeing goodness.  In thinking less of me and more of others.  This part of the journey has the potental to be the most wonderful yet.  I am excited to see where it will lead.

Christmas Thoughts

Christmas Thoughts-

One would think that the holiday season would be the happiest time of the year.  The world decorates. Lights twinkle on trees in homes.  Stores draw attention to displays with lighting.  Ribbons and bows decorate doors.  Garlands of fresh greens grace mantles and furniture.  Dressed up trees grace homes.  Christmas music makes us smile and even sing along.  Presents are wrapped in festive colors.  Surprises abound.

Yet, amid all the attempts to convince the world that this is the most wonderful time of the year, often it is not.  The hype is all about getting that someone special the perfect gift.  Or making sure the children have everything they want.  I remember when our son was a little guy.  I handed him a catalog of children's toys and asked him to put an "x" on anything he would like for Christmas.  Gave him a crayon and left the room.  When I returned, he had marked everything on every page with that x.  And why not? I loved his response.

I do admit that a special gift selected just for me is a lovely thing.  I enjoy the hunt for something special for those in my circle, too.   It makes my heart smile to know they will enjoy a gift given from my heart.  Giving is the real purpose, right?  That is what retail tells us.

It's a funny thing about gifts.  While they are certainly appreciated and even loved, the most precious gifts cannot be purchased.  They won't fit in any size box.  They are those things we make the choice to give.  They include our time.  Maybe a lunch date.  Or a time over coffee with a friend or family member.  In today's world where families are on tight time schedules, the gift of a few moments to visit is priceless.  Letting someone know that they are loved and appreciated by giving the gift of a few moments will be remembered for a lifetime.

Maybe Christmas is about slowing down just a bit.  Don't we all enjoy a cup of hot chocolate piled high with marshmallows on a snowy or cold evening?  Or a glass of wine while visiting in front of a fire?  Maybe it is about reconnecting.  Reflecting on the year that has been.  Recounting the good and the not so good.  Relishing moments.  Being grateful.  Telling someone you love them.  Refusing to get caught up in media hype.  Or at least trying.

I know.  It is difficult to find time to just be.  But, it is necessary if we are to be whole and healthy.

Just like you, we will be busy with preparations.  We will purchase gifts for our loved ones and those special friends who bring such light and joy into our lives.  We will decorate our trees.  Garland strung with lights will grace the front door welcoming all who visit.  We will do special things for our family.  Those are all things we want to do.  We will play Christmas music in our house and car.  Just like everyone else.

What I hope is different for us this year is the knowledge that the holidays are not easy on people.  Many feel lonely and sad.  I have felt this way.  I know how it hurts.  That feeling that everyone is having a wonderful time, and you are not able to share in the joy.  It doesn't matter what causes those feelings.  During the holiday season when everything is about being together and being loved, feeling like others don't love you or that you are alone in this big world is magnified.  I want to be aware.  To be welcoming to those who may be putting up a good front.  To reach out beyond myself and offer friendship.

Before we know it, it will be a memory.  All the decorations will be placed in boxes and stored for another year.  Life will return to our normal-whatever that looks like.  We will say it was such a good holiday, and that we are happy it is over.  What must not return to normal is our forgetting that life is more than trees and presents.  It is all about people.  Wonderful folks who come in all sizes and shapes. Who come into our lives with gifts to give-gifts of friendship and love.  Gifts of caring.  Gifts of being there when our world is falling apart.  We must hold on to memories of our children and grandchildren laughing with us.  Cooking something special.  Sharing that once a year thing.  We must remember to love on one another every month of the year.

Tonight I read something in a book by Joel Osteen.  My son gave me the book for Christmas a few years ago.  He said a car has a large front windshield and a small rearview mirror.  The large front windshield is pointing us into our future. It is large because our world is large.  We don't know what awaits us, but we can be sure that God loves us and is helping us move toward a better, brighter tomorrow.  The rear windshield is small.  It represents our past.  That part of us that is filled with the good and the bad.  We cannot change it.  It is our choice if we live in that small window.  However, if we do that, we will never move forward toward our best.  I love that.  I am going to think about that everyday.  When the holidays are history, our life continues.

It is my hope and prayer that each of us take time to rest along the road to Christmas.  To celebrate.  To remember.  And to always keep the warmth of this special time in our hearts.

Merry Christmas.

Know What?

Know What?

It is time to bring joy and peace into this world.  It is time to stop carrying grudges.  It is time to care for one another.  It is time to find quiet in our own lives.  To stop the noise.  To stop the constant negative words and actions that have become the norm.  It is time to believe in the goodness of others.  To believe that life has meaning.  To believe that giving is more important than getting.

To reach out and bring others into our circle.  To listen instead of insisting on others listening to us.  To acknowledge that we are only one small speck in this vast universe.  To sing and dance for no reason other than we can.

To refuse to be drawn into negative conversations.  To find what is positive and nurture that.  To know that every action has  the power to change those in our space.  To think before we say something that might harm another.  Or damage another.  To knock that chip off our own shoulder thus allowing ourselves to be more  open to what might make its way into our life.

It is time to forgive.  To walk in love and peace.  To refuse to be drawn into drama after drama.  To acknowledge that differences exist but they need not define us.  To reach out and help others with simple acts.  Acts that show our true spirits.

It is time to stop the madness.  Time to stop pointing fingers and open our hands and hearts to others.  To have folks into our homes for meals and conversation.  To cherish family and friends.

Yes, it is time.

Expectations

Expectations--


A rainy afternoon.   Winter is announcing her arrival with cooler days and nights.  Snow can't be far behind.  All to be expected.

Expected.  An interesting word.  We live our lives with expectations.  Some we realize.  Others become distant dreams or wishes.  Living with expectations gives our life purpose.  Expecting a great concert means we are hyped up and ready to experience a good time.  Expecting a baby brings with it the promise of the future.  We plan, purchase, talk about this coming event.  We expect others to share in our joy.  Graduating from school whether it be college or a trade continues our expectation for earning a living wage.  Young people expect to make the team after hours and hours of practice.  The list continues.

Somewhere along life's continuim we expect to grow old.  We desire to live our life fully until the last breath.  We exercise, eat the right foods, keep positive thoughts at the front of our minds.  We engage in meaningful relationships with those we enjoy.  We develop hobbies that provide our minds and bodies with much needed things to do.  Our wish is to be vibrant until the last minute of our lives.  Growing old is not a bad thing.  In fact, it can be the most meaningful time of life.  Unless it is cut short by disease or accident.  Or by others wishing harm.

Wishing harm.  It can happen in relationships.  Families, friends, partners, husbands, wives have the ability to cause great harm to one another.  Could it be that the "I" in all relationships takes center stage thus allowing very little room for others?  Most plays engage multiple characters in dramas that work around one or two challenges.  The challenge is introduced.  We then have the opportunity to watch as the actors work through the problems in search of a solution.  Compromise is almost always part of the equation.  Not everyone gets everything.  Hopefully, everyone receives enough to continue.  And the play ends.  The stage grows dark.

Wishing harm cuts much deeper than this.  In our world wishing harm seems to be a way of life for some.  This is playing itself out on a national stage.  We are drawn into the pain and suffering of others in distant lands.  Those we do not know personally.  Yet, we do know them.  We are part of them.  We expect to go to work, to return home, to greet and be greeted by those we love and who love us.  We expect to visit over a coffee with friends perhaps discussing coming events or holiday plans. We expect to wake up to a new day.  Just like they did.  When violence rips these expectations out from under us, we are left wondering how we got to this place.

I struggle with this.

However, amid the destruction of lives comes a new day.  A day like no other, to be sure.  We cannot avoid that new day.  It has to be faced and walked through.  Lives are forever changed.  Beliefs shift.  Tolerance and acceptance become issues that tear at our deepest self.  We know what we never dreamed we would know.  Violence has showed its ugly head.  Nothing is the same.

Because of these events, new expectations arise.  We walk forward understanding that peace is not a dream.  It is an expectation.  We can be assured that one day nations will grasp the fact that we are so much richer and better when we learn tolerance toward one another.  That our differences need not end in conflict.  That we can come together in small groups and communities to talk about who we are. And  we can listen to others.  No one has the absolute corner on everything.  By spending time in conversation we open ourselves to greater understanding.  We also give others the opportunity to understand us.

Expectations.  They propel us forward toward what we view as worthy.  May we always live with her guiding us on our journey.