Used Up Your Kindness Quotient for the Day?

Used Up Your Kindness Quotient for the Day?


Tolstoy wrote, "Nothing can make our life, or the lives of other people, more beautiful than perpetual kindness."

That is thought-provoking.  We all understand what kindess looks like.  We recognize it when we see it  being exercised.  We may even be aware when we are extending it to others.

Here is a question to think over.  Would a component of kindess be putting ourselves and our own opinions last?  Would it mean we are careful with the words we choose to use?  Being thoughtful about our word choices doesn't mean we are a door mat.  Instead, it means we are willing to think about the other person.  We can make our points known without knocking the listener to the ground.

What about criticism?  Is that an attribute of kindness?  Are we trying to help another person when we point out something in them that we believe needs a bit of revision?  Is it possible we honestly believe we are being kind when we share ways the other person needs to change?  I know from experience how that type of "kindness" wounds.  I have had that type of "kindness" extended to me.  From where I stand, criticism is just that--criticism.  Maybe it depends on the relationship with the person who delivers the "others think you need to change" message.  However, when those "others" have no face, one begins to wonder.

Does being critical make one feel superior?  Do we "fit in" better if we find fault with a person, a group, a teacher, a co-worker?  Going along with the group is the path of least resistance.  Maybe we recognize that kindness is being withheld, yet lack the strength to swim upstream against the current.  After all, we know how this works.  Should we extend kindness to one who is outside the norm as we see that norm, we stand the chance of being criticized, too.  A big risk.  A difficult decision.

Sometimes we extend our kindness quotient for the day with co-workers.  By the time we return to our nests, kindness has run dry.  We snap at our family members, lose patience over the simplest of things, and hear a definite sharp tone in our voices.   Yep, kindness has been used up for that day.

Let's imagine we have a huge basket of kindness.  All day we pull small bits of kindness out of it and give it away.  We give it to the cashier at the grocery store, to the person at the dry cleaners, to the bank teller.  We continue to make withdrawals as the day progresses.  If we work in a health care facility, we give away large chunks to people who are sick or frightened.  If we work in a school, we use our kindness to build up the children within our care.  Each time we make a withdrawal, the basket becomes a bit emptier.

Now, think about it a different way.   What if each time we reach into the basket for a bit of kindness and give it away, it is immediately replaced by an even larger amount.  That means kindness never, ever, runs out.  It is always full in our lives.  There is always more to give.  How would that impact our lives?  I like that word picture.  It is one I shall carry with me because sometimes I need to be reminded that kindness is hope-giving.

Beautiful lives reflect kindness.