How Important is Encouragement?

How Important is Encouragement?--


What do you think?  How important is it to be encouraged?  Can you remember a time when you were lifted by someone's words?  Do you remember a moment when you gave encouragement to another?

Let's examine those questions.  Let's begin with the importance of encouragement.

Educators work very hard.  When I was teaching, it was not unusual for me to bring home an armload of work to read through.  I wish I had documented all those evenings and weekends I spent bent over writings that had to be read.  And only by me.  My students expected and received comments on everything they turned in to be read.  Even when the work was less than I wished, I felt it was my job to find something positive to write on each paper.  If I forgot to do that, students would bring the paper to me and request a comment.

You see, they wanted to believe that what they produced had merit.  There was a need to be validated by me as their teacher.  There were certainly times when I had to look extra hard, but I knew that one comment might be the only positive one that day.  How could I refuse them?

I fully understand that many educators do not agree with me on this.  Doesn't matter to me.  I have seen the eyes of students light up when they received something good.  Repeated failure does not motivate.  One day years ago there was a knock on my front door.  When I opened it, there stood two of my former students.  They were now in junior college.  They had never been to my home.   After inviting them in, we sat in the family room and visited about what they were doing now that they were out of high school.  I will never forget why they decided to stop by.

They wanted to show me their grades.  Their comment humbled me.  They said that they wanted to share their accomplishment with me because they knew I would be pleased for them, and that I had cared about them.  Bring on the tissues.  Sitting in my family room were two young women who were trying to make something of their lives.  And they wanted to share that with me.  When they left, I sat in the room thinking about my time with them.  I was reminded once more of the value of every human life.

I am not alone in this.  Many educators have this experience.  We know everyone has value.  I always felt it was my job to help students find their value.  Believe me, I could write books on this subject.

What about a time you needed encouragement?  Was it long ago or yesterday?

Ever heard anyone say they were taken for granted?  I understand that statement.  Certainly I have felt used.   Humans seem to be wired to need encouragement.  We function at a much higher level when we are valued.  If we believe that others don't appreciate the effort we are making or the job we are doing, we can become quite discouraged.   We can talk to ourselves and try to pump ourselves up, but it isn't the same as having another person acknowledge us.

I am never totally put together.  There is always one more thing I could do to finish the look.  So, when someone actually tells me that I look great, I beam.  Isn't that the silliest thing?  Something so trivial would carry such a punch.  Just that little encouragement stays with me forever.  I remember the time and place.  I remember the person.  Yes, this is shallow.  There are many other examples I could give.  However, it makes the point that we need encouragement on all levels.  Try giving an honest compliment to someone and watch their face.   Should we not always be willing to lift another?

Courage lives in the middle of encouragement.  Maybe that is the clue.  Maybe it takes courage to find the good in another when  our own need is great.  I understand that.   But, I find my greatest joy in reaching out to others.  I tend to forget my own needs in the process of sharing life with them.   Courage might mean I look another person in the eyes and tell them I admire their ability to create, or paint, or write, or care for others.  We don't want to invade another's space so courage is needed to step toward another human in a meaningful way.  Who knows.  That very day maybe the day they need it they most.

It would be wonderful to be remembered as an encourager.  I would love that.  If I helped another reach a goal or believe in their ability to achieve their greatest dream, that would be enough for me.  I will say this again--our time on this earth is so limited.  We do not get do-overs.  We get one shot.  What if someone needs me to lift them, and I am too self-absorbed to see?

So, go forth this coming week and be that encourager to just one person.  The checker at the grocery store, the teller at the bank, the co-worker who drives you insane, the husband/wife/partner who never thanks you for all you do to make their life work, the child who asks thousands of questions, the teen who thinks you are a dork--pick just one.  Maybe start with the easy one which is not the teen!!:)  Try giving away one tiny bit of encouragement this week.  And then think about the reaction of the person receiving and your own reaction.  Spend a little time contemplating how we could change the world by offering this to others.

Personally, I think you must be pretty great if you are reading this!   Blessings.